my village

They say it takes a village to raise a child.

This is my village.

(Or at least, part of it.)

In my village there are friends who take each and every step of the motherhood journey alongside me. There are people who I can call at 3 am if I need to – without questions asked. There are people who offer to watch my kids at the jump of a hat when I am in need. There are people who go out of their way to care for us, to love us, to pray for us. There are people who deliver me iced coffee. Bring us food when we’re sick. Stop and pick up groceries because they know it will take a load off my shoulders. There are people who know my favourite treats, my bad habits, my strengths and my weaknesses – yet still accept me as I am. In my village there are children I have prayed for since before they existed. Children who I eagerly anticipated alongside their mothers. Children I love beyond words, even if they don’t belong (entirely) to me. In my village, there are best friends for my babies.

In my village there are prayer warriors. There are secret keepers. There are babysitters. There are encouragers. Supporters. Mentors. In my village, there are funny people with whom I love to laugh. There are people who have seen my in both my brightest moments and my darkest hours. In my village, there are faith builders and role models. In my village, there is a great deal of wisdom to be imparted.

In my village there are parents, grandparents, sisters, bothers, aunts, uncles and best friends, all who support us every day, in each decision. There are people who care for my babies as though they were their own. People I’m proud to know and love.

They say it takes a village to raise a child.

This is my village.

And I’m pretty darn blessed to be belong to it.

rejuvenation

No one will argue with me when I say that there’s something so entirely, incredibly rejuvenating that comes along with the entrance of spring. This year, especially, we have been waiting, and waiting, and waiting for spring to arrive. And arrive it has.

My soul is revived. Energized. Excited.

I have bee more productive in the last two or three weeks than I probably was for the past four months. I am tackling tasks that kept getting pushed and pushed and pushed off. For another day, another week, another month. Evan has been landscaping and working in the yard like crazy – he is in his element. Evalyn is enjoying hours of outside time nearly every day. Gwen is excited to learn and explore in the grass.

With this season comes new life. New hopes and new dreams.

It makes me excited for the adventures my girls and I will have in the coming months as we enjoy the outdoors, the sunshine and all the beauty of God’s creation.

The windows are open and the breeze is bringing with it the fresh smell of spring air into my kitchen. My house is filled with the smells of food I’ve been cooking all morning while Big Sister is at school and Little Sister is sleeping. I can hear our chickens clucking away as they are wandering around the yard, getting used to this place they now call home. I can see the dog sprawled out in the sun smack dab in the middle of the front yard. Across the road, I see our favourite neighbors feeding their (or, our, as Evalyn would tell you) horses, goats, donkey, chickens and ducks. I’m itching to get outside and move as soon as the baby wakes up.

Today is a beautifully rejuvenating day here in my home.

Thank you, God.

she’s her daddy’s girl

The husband is about as outdoorsman’y as they come. He hunts, he fishes, he does yard work. Basically, he’d live outside if he could. Little Miss Evalyn has gained her love for the outdoors from him. So far, in her limited 2.5 years of experience, this has consisted mostly of spending hours and hours playing outside. She would also live outside if she could.

She likes to go for walks, dig worms, do chalks, ride her bike, help Daddy in the garden, go to the park – it doesn’t really matter what – as long as she’s outside.

Last week, Evan decided to give her her first introduction to a favorite outdoor pastime of his – fishing.

Evalyn was over the moon excited during dinner at the prospect of going fishing with Daddy and gobbled up her food in record time. Unsurprisingly, though, the actual experience was not as amazing. I think Evan’s words were, “that was the worst fifteen minutes of fishing ever”. I don’t think she quite grasped the fact that she would just have to stand still on the side of the riverbank. I don’t blame her. I think fishing is way more fun in theory than in reality.

Needless to say, Evalyn still thought it was pretty cool and is still talking about going fishing with Daddy, how she caught one fish, and how she poked it in the eye.

She’s her Daddy’s girl, without a doubt (side note: are they twins or what!!).

I’m sure there will be many, many more fishing dates in the future … only this time, he may wait another few years to invite her again.

sugar bush

Last Monday, we went on a fun spring winter (I’m not even sure which word to use) to the Sugar Bush to see where maple syrup is made. We went with Evalyn’s preschool class. Let me tell you, there is something about going on a class trip with your kid (even if it is just preschool) that screams I AM A MOM. I have kind of always waited for the day that I’d get to go on all of these fun trips and since a crazy wind storm canceled our Pumpkin Patch trip in the fall, this was our first.

  We were extra lucky because Nana came to visit to go on the trip with us. So fun!

We learned (or at least I learned … not sure Eva caught on to anything except the fact that we ate pancakes) so many interesting facts about making maple syrup, went on a tractor pulled wagon ride, a walk through the bush and enjoyed delicious pancakes smothered in real maple syrup.

I derive from Maple Syrup People so this is definitely my kind of treat. Over a week later, Eva is still talking about it – even though at the time, she spent a good portion of the morning whining about wanting to go back on the wagon ride. I just love these kind of fun adventures that bring her so much joy.

this house. our home.

I had planned to write a post reviewing my February goals (HA HA HA --- you’ll see how THOSE went soon) and set some for this month. But then something happened at breakfast that totally changed the course of my thoughts for this morning. The baby is an early riser and as of late, so is Evalyn. Up until she was potty trained she was always a 7am or later riser. Since training, we’re lucky if she sleeps until 6:15. I fought it for a long time. I hated it. I got frustrated. But now? I’m learning to accept it. And then add the baby to the mix, she’s always up early anyway. Again, lucky if we get to 6 am with her. With Eva as a baby I could do the whole “make her stay in her crib until 7am as long as she was happy” thing with no qualms and eventually, she always slept past 7. It wasn’t such a hard game with her, though, because when she was a baby, waking up “early” meant 6:45.  Leaving the baby in her crib to “learn” to sleep later isn’t as easy this time around because if I do, she wakes her sister up and then I’m just left with two pre-6am risers.  I used to feed the baby at 4am and crawl back in bed relishing the idea of sleeping another 2.5-3 hours. Now when I climb back in bed I pray I get another hour. Anyway, this is getting away from me – this post isn’t even meant to talk about when we wake up – I just say this to say that I am learning to embrace the early mornings. As much as I can.

The reason I mention the change in our mornings is to say that one benefit is that our mornings are less stressful these days. Getting up at 6 gives us more time before Daddy races out the door at 7:25 than when we used to roll out of bed at 7 or later. What this means is that after we spend a few minutes all huddled together in Mommy and Daddy’s bed,we make our way to the kitchen for breakfast.

This morning it worked out that all four of us were sitting up to the table together to eat. As soon as I sat down with my coffee and oatmeal, Eva said, “So, Mommy, how was your day?”

And in that moment I realized how beautiful it is that she sees our dining room table as a place for conversation, communication and family. That this is the place we gather. This is the place we connect. Where we touch base. Where we share details of our lives and learn more about each other and join together as one unit at the end (or in this case, the beginning) of the crazy, hectic days of our lives.

When she said this, I looked around my dining room table and realized what is most important… that my girls see our table, our dining room, our home as a safe place for them to land.

It’s been almost a year since we started on our journey with this home. March 20, 2012 was the day we first saw this house and put an offer in. Over the next days and weeks as the details got sorted out and multiple hurdles were overcome, God quickly showed us that this was, undoubtedly, meant to be home. Logically, when we look at how it all went down, we never “should” have gotten this place. There were too many things that happened to work against us. But we were blessed. It was a God thing.

It’s been 9 months since we took possession and started renovations. Seven months since we moved our little family of four to the country to start something new.

If I’m being honest, we are no where near where I expected we’d be after over half a year of living here. No where close. My expectations were too high. My plans and goals were unreachable.

This is what my dining room looks like, at this very moment.

 

Our table is old and ugly and falling apart. It is surrounded by random, mismatched chairs. There are old towels strewn about, trying to protect our home somewhat from the damages of baby led weaning, there are no doors on the closet, with coats and hats and shoes thrown about, no window coverings, no china cabinet. Random toys are stacked on, around and under the table. There’s a dollar store bunny chair cover over the chair where’s Eva booster, that she no longer even uses, is. Eventually, our table and chairs and china cabinet will be refinished and repaired and the rest of the room will come together. And until today, I kept feeling like it’s just not happening fast enough.

But then a few simple words from my always wise two and a half year old reminded me that this doesn’t matter. When we sat down together and she looked at me and asked how my day was, I realized she doesn’t care.

When we spend time together in this home, do my children notice that our table and chairs set is incomplete? Do they notice that there are no closet doors in our rooms? Or that the baseboards are missing? Or that the decor is lacking? Or that our front door is old as the hills? No.

They notice none of that.

What these sweet babies notice is that our mornings start with the four of us (often five when the dog joins us) curled up in Mommy and Daddy’s bed, giggling and giving good morning hugs and kisses. What they notice is that we have the privilege of enjoying coffee and breakfast together. What they notice is that we are together. Our family is together. Healthy, happy and completely, entirely in love with each other.

Sure, we could focus far more of our time and energy on completing the unending list of projects, decorating, renovating … we could do that. We could consciously devote more time and energy to making this place home.

But I know now that it’s okay if we don’t, not all the time. It’s okay to just be sometimes. To forget the list of projects and have quiet mornings and quiet evenings together. To go for walks as a family, instead of always going, going, doing, doing. It’s okay to do this.

It’s okay because the biggest mistake we could make would be to get ourselves so focused on checking things off a list to make this place home that we miss the life we are living here, that we miss the memories we are making and that we miss these moments we’ll never ever get back. Because these moments?

These moments are what make this house our home.

well, hello, march

To be honest, I expected the month of March to start in a crazy way. This past weekend, the husband was heading to ChiTown for a big ol’ boys weekend, so I knew it would be four days of straight up cray cray while I ruled the roost at home. What I didn’t expect was for it to be quite as cray cray as it’s been.

Friday started out pretty awesome. My girlfriend and her little guy had been here for a sleepover and we had a blast. Then they left. It was naptime and things went down hill. I’ll spare the gory details but, Eva’s nap didn’t go well and it had to do with potty issues. The end. We ended up managing a decent nap and I thought all was well.

However, after that, things got weirder and weirder as she started refusing to pee and screaming and clawing at me when I tried to make her go. It got worse and worse. She spent the afternoon crying and telling me her bum hurt. By 5pm, I figured she had a UTI and it was time to head in to the ER. Thankfully, the Aunties were coming for dinner so M came with me and L stayed with Gwennie. We managed a record ER trip, there and back in an hour, including the 15 minute drive each way. And, by the grace of God, we were able to get a sample at the hospital. And only 3/4 of it ended on my lap and Eva’s pants. Anyhow, it amazingly came out negative for infection but we expected her to get worse overnight. She did not! She woke up the next morning fever free and feeling fine, able to pee again. I assume everything was related to the initial nap incident.

The rest of the weekend went by okay, except that Gwen didn’t nap longer than 45 minutes and was up 5-8 times each night, until Sunday afternoon when I started to feel iffy. I was willing it away, telling myself it was just in my head. But by the time Evan got home around 9pm, there was no denying it. I had the flu. I was able to sleep but woke up at 3am when it hit me with a vengeance. And it all went downhill from there. Again, I’ll spare the nasty details but it was bad. And when my poor Gwennie woke up at 6:45 it didn’t take long to figure out she had the bug too. Thankfully, Evan was able to stay home with us. Not sure what I would have done without him as I didn’t even have enough strength to hold the baby.

Our saving grace is that this bug has been quick. It’s vicious, but doesn’t last long and Gwen and I are on the road to recuperation. Unfortunately, the Daddy-io came down with it last night and is struggling today. Evalyn is the only one left standing so I’m walking on eggshells waiting for that ticking time bomb to go off. I am praying fervently that God will spare her from this.

Add in to this some other, ahem, issues of the female variety, the fact that I washed all my clothes in hot water and shrunk my jeans and that I got a nosebleed that was reminiscent of the red sea, and I am starting to say, “Okay, March, what gives?” The start of the month has been a little different than planned. I haven’t yet had a chance to review how February went and set any goals for this month, think about Gwen’s 8 month update or dig myself out from the mounds and mounds of pukey laundry. All in time, all in time.

I know the saying “In like a lion, out like a lamb” is supposed to refer to the weather, but I’m hoping it also holds true for the way this month goes for our family.

Here’s to a calmer remainder of the month!

House Tour: Living Room (Before) and (Now)

Like I’ve said a few times, this whole home tour thing is going to have to be a “before” and “now” series as opposed to before and after because despite the tremendous amount of work my husband has done in our home, it is far from being in the “after” state just yet. Aside from the bathroom, which I’ve already shown you, the rest of the house is still in a state of progress.

This is the living room as it looked the day we took possession of the house. Nasty, dirty carpet. Crumbling walls. Beautiful (read: hideous Grandma style) window coverings.

Here are a few pics of the process.

Hours, well, hundreds of hours, of work. Some blood, sweat and tears. Perhaps a choice word or two. And my husband transformed the space into this….

(The doors off this room are the kiddo’s bedrooms)

And just for fun, a side by side comparison of the before and now from the same angle.

So, what’s been done and what’s left do?

Obviously, the nasty carpet was replaced with gorgeous hardwood flooring. And let me just say this, these floors were a labour of love. I cannot even tell you how many days and nights and weekends my rockin’ husband spent installing this floor (with the help of his uncle, my uncle and a few pals here and there). The walls were repaired and room was painted – including ceiling, window trim, doors and door frames. Can I tell you the huge difference that painting the trim made? I remember coming into the house shortly after he finished the trim and my jaw hit the floor. It was like an entirely different house. It brightened the room up so much and makes the windows look like they’re in a lot better shape than they actually are. We also added the wall sconces as there was no lighting in the room and I didn’t want to rely entirely on floor lamps. Hello, monkey children climbing all over them!

What’s left to do. The big one? Baseboards. Although he just painted the existing window and door trim in the rooms, the baseboards were not worth saving. They are high on our priority list, we’re just still deciding exactly which direction to go. Also, poor Gwendolyn still needs a doorknob. It’s been sitting on my dresser for months. MONTHS! Problem is, house stuff usually starts after the hour of 7pm, once she’s in bed so it keeps getting pushed to the wayside.

Eventually, we might take a few feet off the living room and add a hallway so that the girl’s bedrooms aren’t directly connected to the main living area. We’ll see, though. So far, I haven’t minded it but as they get older it may be more ideal to have a little bit of separation. We’d like to do something with the little alcove beside where our (prehistoric) TV sits. My vision here is built in book cases with a small bench seat. A little reading nook, if you will. Maybe a fireplace with a TV mounted above it in. The kid’s book slings and toy corner will also see some revamping and relocation in the very near future, just as soon as the playroom is up and functioning (it’s close!!). The sofa table needs some desperate attention. Eventually, the windows will be replaced and I’ll add some type of curtains. Although, I haven’t decided just what yet. The decor is less than stellar. Basically, I’ve just recently unpacked my boxes of decor so I have haphazardly placed my existing decorations around our home. Nothing really has a “place” yet and I have some ideas for new looks and new directions I’d like to go in but alas … it’s all about finding the time and money to browse and shop and add to my collection. Sigh. All in due time, right?

So there you have it. This is the area of our home we spend most of our time. It’s not nearly as cozy as I’d like it… but we’ll get there.

from us, to you.

I’m stopping in to wish you all the most wonderful Christmas season. It’s likely that you won’t hear from me again until the new year, but then again, perhaps you may. As of 5pm today, Daddy will be on holidays for a good, long chunk. We’ve got lots going on in the coming weeks and are over the moon excited to celebrate our first Christmas in our new home, with our new babe.

Enjoy a season of cherished memories and relaxation with your families. May your hearts be filled with the wondrous love of Jesus as we celebrate His birth.

Merry Christmas.

From Us, To You.

(I apologize for the pic of a pic)

our year

Last January, I wrote this post highlighting some of my goals and hopes for 2012. And now, as 2012 is so quickly coming to a close I can’t help but think that wow – this has been our year.

I started off the year 14 weeks pregnant with Gwendolyn. Just the beginning, really.

In February, we started our house hunt, I had my first overnight away from Evalyn, and we survived the winter.

March was when the year really started to get crazy. Evan and I had food poisoning, landing me in the hospital overnight, Evalyn cut her eye teeth which made for two weeks from you-know-where, she turned 18 months, and we bought a house. All in the same week.

In April, I finished work and started maternity leave and we also started packing the apartment.

In May, we hit the zoo, did more packing and then on the last day of the month, we took possession of our house and things turned chaotic. This was also the month that the 2012 summer baby boom began, with the birth of Connor.

June was a long month. A long, hard month. Evan spent his days at work and his evenings at the new house, working hard to do renovations before we moved in. I was 100 months pregnant, living out of boxes and wrangling a toddler in the heat of the summer. There were times when four or five days passed without Evalyn seeing her Daddy and many nights when he got home long after I was tucked into bed for the night. Evalyn turned 21 months – an age that was significant to me because it was the age she would be when she became a big sister. My due date came. And my due date passed.

July rolled around and things changed in an instant. My water broke late at night on July 1, Canada day, and my sweet second born girl was placed in my arms early the next morning. July was spent with my mom here for a week after Gwen’s birth and Evan’s mom here for the better part of two weeks following that. And it’s a good thing, indeed, because the renovations were still going strong. Although the pressure eased up a bit after our decision to push our moving date back two weeks, there was still a ton of work to get done and so Evan was still spending most evenings and weekends at the house. Two more babies were added to our gang in the weeks following Gwen’s birth, when Briar and my sister had their littles.

When August hit, we knew the end was in sight as the moving date got closer and closer. The middle of the month rolled around and we said goodbye to our first home, the place our babies were born, to start a new chapter in our lives. August 12, 2012, on our sixth anniversary, we moved into our very first, owned by us, house. Just a week or so later, our next niece, sweet Jolie, arrived.

In September, the baby boom ended when Lochlan was born on labor day, exactly 9 weeks after Gwen – book ending the summer by being born on the last holiday Monday. Evan went away on a moose hunt for ten days so the girls and I did some visiting with family and friends, we celebrated Evalyn’s second birthday and she started preschool for the first time. All the while, we continued, slowly but surely to make this thing we call a house into the place we call a home.

In October, we hit up the pumpkin patch, celebrated Thanksgiving, painted and pumpkin and went trick or treating. It was a month of making traditions and enjoying our favourite season of the year.

On the first day of November, Evalyn decided it was time to start potty training so we ran down that road – and have been running down it ever since. We spent a lot of time at home that month, because of the training but managed to get in some fun, too, like going to meet Santa. Again, the renovations, work around the house, and settling in continued. Most importantly, in November, we finally got a dishwasher after four months without.

Now December is here and it’s been, perhaps, the quickest month yet. We had Gwen’s dedication, decorated for Christmas, did a lot of shopping and put a lot of time and work into some little projects around the house that helped us feel more settled.

The year has been crazy. It has included some of the longest days of my life. Yet, it has zoomed past at an unimaginable speed. We’ve been blessed beyond compare. We’ve added another beautiful child to our family. We have the perfect starter home – a fixer upper out in the sticks. We’ve learned, more than ever, just how strong our support system is. We’ve been humbled and astonished at the amount of hours our friends and family put in to help us pack, roof, paint, babysit, install flooring, unpack and so on…

In all, we give glory to our Father for our countless blessings, knowing that without him, none of this would be possible.

2012 was our year. Thanks be to God.

an update, of sorts

It seems that I’ve dropped off the face of the earth. I’m not sure what’s happened to me. It’s not like there’s a lack of stuff to blog about. There are things that happen daily that I think, ‘Oh I should blog about that before I forget’ … you know, like Eva telling me that I’m “not ah-yowed to spoke until Jesus comes” or the Christmas tree falling down while I was decorating and coming a few inches within landing on Gwen before I caught it, or our Christmas decorations, our first Christmas party of the year, the house renovations. Um, yea. We’ve lived here 4 months and I’ve yet to show any before/after pics? Here’s a promise … I will show you our bathroom renovation before the week ends. Mkay? Hold me to it.

We’ve been having a blast getting ready for the Christmas season. Witnessing Christmas from a two year old’s perspective is amazing. Last night, we were talking about Jesus and how he is God’s son and that God sent Him to us as a GIFT, which is why we give gifts at Christmas. She asked me, “Where is Jesus?”  As always, I told her that Jesus is in her heart. She said, “No Mom. Jesus is on the board at Mrs. F’s house”. So. Much. Funny here. Mrs F is her teacher. So, she was telling me that he’s on the bulletin board at school. Totally adorable and I love how kids assume their teachers do not exist outside of the classroom. She is enthralled by the decorations, lights, Christmas songs, presents, wrapping paper, Christmas shows and stories. I took a video of her “reading” The Night Before Christmas to her sister. Maybe I’ll even get around to sharing it some day. She knows the story of the First Christmas pretty well now. Well, at least she knows that there’s a Mary, a Joseph, an Angel, a trip to Bethlehem and a Baby Jesus in the hay. The rest is just details, right?

Gwen is growing like a bad weed. And I want it to stop now. NOW NOW NOW. Well, not really. I love the new developments and explorations. But my dear heart, it goes too fast. Way too fast. She’s rolling, working on sitting and seems to be in one of those phases of frustration where she wishes she could do more than she can and is no longer happy just being in one spot. Only a few months until we hit the crawling stage, if she’s like her sister. Hold. Me. Now.

The girls have both been sick. Last week was pitiful. But thankfully, we are on the upswing. Hopefully this means we’ve gotten it out of the way and are clear for the holidays. Wishful thinking, perhaps.

I miss this here old blog. Maybe someday I’ll get my groove back and commit myself to daily, or at least more than weekly or bi-weekly posting. Maybe soon I’ll be inspired. Until then, we’ll just keep living the moments.

Dedication

Yesterday we had the opportunity to participate in our church’s 2012 Baby Dedication service. It is our belief that our role as parents is a lifelong duty, privilege and calling that is God given. We believe our primary charge and duty as parents is to lead our children toward Christ and set them towards a life in which they will develop a personal and committed relationship with their Saviour. Our greatest hope and prayer is that one day, our girls (and any future children we may have) will accept Jesus as their Lord and Saviour and live their lives alongside Him.

Because of these beliefs and hopes, we both, as individuals and as parents, cherish the opportunity to stand before our church, our family and our friends and dedicate our children, the blessing that they are to us, back to a mighty God who has given them to us and commit ourselves to a lifetime of faithful parenting.

Each year, our church has a Baby Dedication service where each family who has welcomed a new addition in that year has the opportunity to participate. This year, there were fives babies added to our congregation who were prayed over and celebrated last night.

Just as it was the year Evalyn was born, this night was monumental and special to me as a mother – not only as I reflected on and prayed over my own child – but as I had the opportunity to pray for the children who Gwen will grow up with at church as well, including one of our best friend’s little dudes.

One amazing thing about last night is that every living grandparent of the four babies who were at the service was present and they all read blessings of scripture and prayed over their grandchildren throughout the service. What a testament of faith that is to me!

For our portion of the service, we started with my Dad reading a scripture that is so close to my heart and that stuck with me through the last bit of my pregnancy and during Gwen’s birth.

Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him and he will do this: He will make your righteous reward shine like the dawn, your vindication like the noonday sun. Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for Him. - Psalm 37: 5-7a

I read the following letter I had written to Gwen and then excerpts from the book “Mommy Promises" which is a beautiful book depicting the feelings I have towards my duty as a mother to my girls.

Dear Gwen,

Today, as your father and I stand before our church family, we are committing ourselves to raising you in a way that is compatible with His word, we are making promises to you and to God and we are expressing many prayers and hopes we have for you.

Throughout my pregnancy and your birth, God used you to teach me big lessons about resting in Him, being still in Him, waiting for His good and perfect timing. In the last few weeks of my pregnancy, I did everything in my power to take control over the situation and quickly learned that I was being called to be still. The scripture that Papa read resonated with me throughout those days and throughout the hours of your birth.

It is my prayer for you that as you grow, you will fall deeply in love with your Savior that you will find rest in Him through each season of your life. That you will be still and find peace in him.

It is my prayer that you will always choose Jesus. That you will find refuge in Him and trust in Him both in the brightest days and the darkest hours.

It is my prayer that God will guard your heart and protect your innocence from the evils of this world.

It is my prayer that God will give me the strength and discernment to raise you by example as a Godly woman in a world where God is often pushed aside.

It is my prayer that you will find a lifelong best friend in your sister. A support system and a confidante.

It is our promise to you that we will love each other and strive to build a strong example of marriage for you to witness.

It is our promise that we will love you unconditionally and do our best to make the right decisions for you.

It is our promise that our home will constantly be filled with songs, prayers and conversations about Christ. That His name will never be unfamiliar to you. That you will always have a church family to call home.

Our child, you are fearfully and wonderfully made and we give thanks to God for entrusting you to us for our time on earth.

After reading my letter and book, Evan spoke for a few minutes about the blessing that parenting is and that despite it’s many challenges, it is fun and rewarding and the best part of our lives. He spoke of the woman who Gwen got her name from (his Grandmother) and how she was an example of beauty and faithfulness and family. He read from Ephesians 3: 14-19:

For this reason I kneel before the Father, from whom every family in heaven and on earth derives its name. I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.

He talked about our decision to add another child to our family and how her name has a strong connection to that decision. After he spoke, Gwen’s other grandfather, Evan’s dad, said a prayer of dedication over her and over us.

We don’t take our commitment to these children lightly. We are thankful for our family, for their examples. For our friends and their support. For a close knit church group full of people who have been parents longer than we have who are always eager to lend an ear, give advice and most importantly, pray for and with us on this journey.

For you created my inmost being;
you knit me together in my mother’s womb.
I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.
Psalm 139: 13-14

surprise! a post about halloween!

So, in case you didn’t know – yesterday was Halloween. Surprise!

I have to admit, I kind of dropped the ball on Halloween. As of last Thursday, my kids didn’t even have costumes. Thankfully, though, Kar came to my rescue and showed up on my doorstep with a bag full of costumes to choose from.

We settled on a Pink Bunny for Eva and a GloWorm for Gwenner. Cute, right?

Last night, we headed down into town to have pizza and wings with the Aunties before setting out for trick or treating. I wasn’t sure how it was going to go down because of the weather forecast, but thankfully there was a nice little window where the rain wasn’t very heavy so we were able to sneak out.

Through the day yesterday, Evalyn and I talked about trick or treating and how it would go. I told her she’d ring the door bells, say trick or treat and then people would put candy into the little bag that she had decorated. To say she was pumped would be an understatement. She was also a little confused. At one point yesterday she said to me, “Is trick or treat will kiss Eeba? Is trick or treat has a beard? And a sleigh? Do Eeba say, ‘cuse me Tirck or treat! Can Eeba has a candy?”

Despite the confusion – she managed to figure the whole thing out. And quite quickly, I might add. As soon as the first person gave  her candy, she said, “Okay, Mom. Yet’s go! Next place!” She asked at almost every place if she could go inside and at one place, she even attempted to take off with the entire bowl of candy. A girl after my own heart. We only went to about twelve houses, but that was more than enough to make this kid more hyper than I have ever, ever, ever seen her.

When we got back she and her Daddy had a riot sorting through all of the candy, picking out what to taste and getting super excited about all the goodies.

She opened the door for a few kids who rang at Auntie’s and then she and Evan headed off to drive around to visit a few other people. She went to see our old landlords, her auntie and uncle and her great grandparents. It made for a late night, but oh so worth it.

This morning when she got up, she sat up to the table for breakfast and I heard her say, “Daddy. Thank you for trick or treat. Thank you for driving to Tim and Shelley. It was pretty fun!”  Seeing the joy that this little activity brought to her life? Way better than any trick or treating memories I have! I forgot just how fun it was.

a heart of thanksgiving

Yesterday we, in Canada, celebrated Thanksgiving. There is always something so refreshing and so wonderful about Thanksgiving. Of course, it’s necessary to have a heart of thanksgiving in our day to day lives but taking some time to stop – really stop – and think about our blessings is never a bad thing.

We traveled north to be with Evan’s family for the weekend. And it was good. So good. It had been far too long since we had visited Nana and Grandpa – Gwen’s first time, actually – so it was wonderful to be together.

There is just something about the fall season that brings warmth to my heart and reminds me to be content, joyful and thankful in all things. And it’s certainly not difficult to be thankful when these are the people I get to spend my life with.

 

On Saturday, we got together with the Big Ol’ family for a delicious meal. Can there be anything better than eating 685 pounds of turkey and 17 slices of pie while gathered around a table with some of your favourite people in the world? I think not. And, what makes a big family gathering like this even better and more enjoyable? When both of your kids have good, solid, long naps despite being in new and unfamiliar home. Thanks to that, the afternoon was stress-free and enjoyable for both Evan and I so we could have conversations (real conversations), play games and just have fun.

Now that Thanksgiving is over and we’re back home, bags unpacked, laundry finished… I’m making it a goal, challenging myself, to remember these feelings of thankfulness, gratitude and contentment amidst the chaos of every day life.

Happy Thanksgiving, eh?

we’ll call this the kick off

It is absolutely no secret that autumn is the favourite time of year around our home. The smells, the tastes, the colours – we love it all. This year I haven’t gotten as “in” to fall as I normally do. Because I’m still working on basic every day settling around here, getting out fall decorations has been the furthest thing from my mind. It would be kind of hard to decorate when there’s not much to put decorations on as we don’t have shelves or anything up yet. Anyhoo – I wasn’t feeling my normal sense of peace and contentment that comes with the fall this year and that was starting to bother me. But then this weekend happened and I was reunited with my favourite time of year.

Saturday was a beautiful day. Sunny, cool and crisp. The token autumn day. I spent my morning baking four pies (which has not happened around these parts in a long time), making a pot of chili, washing and hanging laundry on the clothes line. I felt productive, organized and all together good.

And then it got even better when the girls woke up from their naps and we headed out to the Pumpkin Patch with a few friends. Evalyn was so excited about it - she had a blast leading everyone through the corn “amazing”, seeing the animals in the barn and picking out her favourite pumpkin. Gwen had a blast too, clearly.

It was wonderful time spent with our dearest friends. And don’t worry – no one got hit in the head with the “falling” acorns. Although there certainly were some close calls (um, yeah, my husband is definitely the one who thought it would be funny to chuck acorns at people’s heads while in the hay maze).

And of course the day wouldn’t have been complete without three crazy mothers attempting to wrangle their four children into a pile of pumpkins for some pictures. Never mind the fact that only one of these children is remotely able to follow instructions and 2 of them cannot even move, let alone support their own heads. As you can see, that turned out well for us.

(Aren’t my besties perrrrrdy?)

It was a lovely, perfect day. We shall call this the kick off to the fall season.

I’d Like to Thank….

The last few months have been crazy. To say the least. My sweet friend Lindsey said once that this an experience we’ll look back on in 20 years around a table with friends and laugh at. “Hey, remember the time we bought a fixer upper, renovated, had a baby and moved all in the course of two months? Remember that? Ha. That was so funny.” I hope she’s right. Because I sure ain’t laughing just yet.

Needless to say, we have survived. We are all still alive, happy and thriving. Neither Evan or I have killed each other or done each other any permanent harm. My babies are healthy and happy. Our home is coming together nicely. We have survived. But, not alone. Not even a little bit alone.

So, right now I’d like to thank….

Barney, Diego, Dora and Mickey Mouse Clubhouse … for occupying my toddler for many, many, many more hours than I’d care to admit.

McDonald’s Vanilla Iced Coffee and Pepsi Cola … for giving me a daily boost of caffeine. Or seven.

Our friends and family … for every little thing you’ve done. For babysitting, for packing boxes, for unpacking boxes, for cleaning, for bringing food, for laying shingles and hardwood, for painting, for keeping me company while Evan was working around the clock, for the hours and hours and hours of time you’ve given to us. I thought of including some names here, but I know I would forget someone.

My babies … for sleeping well, for transitioning well and for smiling even when I am the most boring Mama in the world and spend too much time working and not enough time playing.

My husband … for busting his booty getting this place ready for us to call home.

My tweeps … for keeping me sane. All the time.

Our church family … for two weeks of wonderful, wonderful meals brought to us daily – making it so that I didn’t have to cook for the first 5 (yes, 5) weeks of Gwen’s life.

Our dreams are becoming our reality but we couldn’t have done it alone. Really, we couldn’t have. And we are so deeply and forever grateful for the support we are constantly shown by our loved ones.

I have so many posts I want to write. I want to answer your questions about homebirth, I want to write a post explaining the significance of Gwen’s name, I want to show you what both my kids are up to, show you some pictures of our house, and share some stories about the adventures of our new life. These will all come in time, I suppose. For now, I’m still trying figure out which way is up.

If These Walls Could Talk

I’ve been thinking about the day I’d write this post for months. Maybe even years. In my head, I’ve been thinking about how I would convey these ideas for as long as I can remember.

For me, buying our first home has been such a bittersweet experience. Yes, I am stoked to have our own place. We’re ready. We’ve been saving and planning for this for years. I’m ready for that. Yet at the same time, the apartment we’ve been living in for the past 5 1/2 years isn’t just any old place that we’ve been killing time. It’s not a crappy high rise building that allows us no space of our own.

The place we’ve been living up until now, although not owned by us, is our home. Our first home, really. Although we did live in one teensy weensy basement apartment in town for a few months right after we got married, this is the place we will remember when we think about our first home.

And so as I’ve spent the last few weeks/months thinking about the prospect of moving and planning for that to happen, I’ve started thinking about so many of the stories that are contained within the walls of this home.

If these walls could talk, they would tell of a young, newly married, head over heels couple who found themselves without a home just three months into their marriage due to a flood in their first apartment.

They would tell of a young woman who was in the midst of undergraduate exams, stressing over finding a place to live and feeling heart broken over having no place to spend their first Christmas together.

They would tell of a generous and gracious family who made accommodations for this young couple to move in within a week, in order to be settled and comfortable before the holidays.

They would go on to tell of years and years of generosity and kindness being bestowed on the young couple by the family who lives upstairs.

If these walls could talk, they would tell of a tiny little black lab, border collie mix who stole the heart of a girl who hated dogs and became her first baby. They would tell of weeks of sleepless nights, house training and cuddling as the dog hater fell in love with her sweet little puppy.

They would tell of years of writing papers, studying for exams, preparing grant proposals, applying for grad school, conducting field work, writing and defending two theses. They would tell of a BA and an MA. They would tell of a husband who supported his wife through it all.

 

If these walls could talk, they would tell of a wife peeing on a stick on a total whim at 6 am one Sunday morning and then startling her husband awake as she jumped on him and screamed, “We’re having a baby!”

They would tell of nine months where a couple grew together in anticipation of their first child’s arrival. They would tell of morning sickness, nursery decorating, belly kicking and some hot, hot summer days that resulted in the wife cooking dinner in her skivvies.

If these walls could talk they would tell of a husband and wife making big decisions for the man to leave a steady, consistent job in order to follow his dreams and start a business of his own, doing what he loves most. They would tell of the best decision they ever made.

If these walls could talk, they would speak of this couple laying their eyes on their first born daughter for the first time when she was brought into the world on their very own bed. They would tell of this couple becoming a family as they fell head over heels in love with a tiny 7lb 10 oz package that they called their own.

If these walls could talk, they would tell of sleepless nights, breast feeding battles, excitement over milestones and a deeper joy than can ever be explained as this family experienced the first year of one little girl’s life together. They would tell of first smiles, first steps and first words.

If these walls could talk, they would tell of this couple’s decision to add another child to the family. They would tell, once again, of a wife taking pregnancy tests and sharing, with excitement and with her one year old by her side, the news that her husband would be a father one more time.

If these walls could talk, they would tell of another pregnancy filled with (more) morning sickness, anticipation and eager excitement. They would tell of an overwhelming joy that was experienced as they prepared to make their first baby a Big Sister.

If these walls could talk, they would tell of the stress and anxiety and excitement over purchasing their first home.

If these walls could talk, they would tell of the birth of a second beautiful, beautiful baby girl. They would tell of a mom, and a dad, and a little girl all falling head over heels in love with the newest member of their clan.

If these walls could talk, they would tell of five anniversaries, six Christmases, thirteen birthdays, two mother’s days and two father’s days, along with countless other holidays and celebrations – all celebrated together.

They would tell of a couple who loved hard, fought hard, worked hard and prayed hard. They would tell of tough times and of fun times. They would tell of joy and of pain. They would tell of mountains and valleys.

If these walls could talk, they would tell you of a young family who developed their roots in this home.

Tonight, we will sleep in this home for the last time. The home that has been so formative in building “us”. The only home my girls have ever known. And that, for me, is oh so bitter sweet. So, as I look around and see empty walls looking back at me, I know they are not empty. Not at all.

If these walls could talk, they would tell you that they are filled with the stories of us.

Becoming Big Sister

My Sweet Evalyn,

The last time I sat down to write a letter to you, we were a mere 10 days away from meeting your Baby Sister, Gwen. As I wrote that letter, tears literally streaming down my cheeks, I was lamenting over the changes that were heading your way. Of course, I spent hours, perhaps days, worrying and wondering about how you would do as you transformed from my only baby to my oldest baby within a matter of minutes. I was worried because you are far too young to understand and prepare yourself for what was ahead. I was worried because you are a Mama’s girl and I wondered how you’d do when you had to share my attention. I was worried because I didn’t know how I’d possibly have the energy to give 100% to two children. I was worried because I thought you would be jealous. I was worried because I thought you might regress in sleep. I was worried because I thought you might not like spending a few days away from me when the baby was born.

But, girl, you have, once again – surprised me and exceeded my expectations completely.

You have made this transition with ease and I am so, so, so proud of you, my sweet girl.

On July 2nd, your Daddy and I weren’t the only ones to fall head over heels in love with Gwennie from the moment we first saw her face. When you arrived home with Papa after your nap, and saw your 7 hour old baby sister for the first time, your life was changed. And immediately, you loved her.

Since that day, the infatuation hasn’t worn off. The first thing you say every morning is “Where’s Baby Gwennie? See her? Kiss her!” You want to hold her, kiss her, pat her and love her all the time. You often tell Mommy to “seed Gwennie” (feed Gwennie) and are concerned if you think I didn’t give her enough milk. You’re protective when people you don’t know well are holding her. You just want to make sure she’s safe, I think. For the first days you were confused and called her Baby Connor or Baby Silas (what her name would have been had she been a brother) but you straightened that out. Then, for a few days, we still had to work on the “him” versus “her” thing, but we’ve straightened that out as well.

My prayer is that you always love your Baby Sister the way you do right now. I can’t wait to watch you grow up together, sharing secrets and lipstick, and hope that you will always be the best of friends. Of course, I'm not naive enough to think that you won’t have bumps along the way.

You are the sweetest Big Sister for our Gwennie. I hope you always know just how proud I am of you.

With love,

Momma

Ride of a Lifetime

As we countdown to Baby #2 day, Evalyn and I have been filling our days with as much summer fun as we can. We’ve been swimming, playing at the park, going to the beach and everything else in between.

On Friday night, we were lucky enough to hit the beach for the second time in one day. First we went out for dinner with the Aunties and then we headed to the beach for ice cream, a walk, a quick play at the park, feeding the duckies, and of course, Eva’s first ride on the carousel.

She loved it, can’t ya tell?

Just to prove I’m not an entirely terrible Mom, though, here is how we ended the ride.

After a few rotations, she decided it wasn’t so bad and started dancing and singing along with the music and waving to Auntie Linda each time we went around. She has been talking about riding da howsy, camel and yion with da songs ever since – so I know we’ll definitely be making another trip or two to the carousel before the summer is over.

Wondering…

 

Tonight I’m sitting here, just wondering…

I’m wondering if I will ever again see a time in my life where I can wear a top or a pair of pants more than once before laundering it because it’s covered in child residue.

I’m wondering if it’s possible to hear Evalyn put the word “honey” or “sweetie” at the end of a sentence without dying of the cute?

I’m wondering if my feet (and other things that are no longer in my range of sight because of this giant basketball) still exist.

I’m wondering if I’ll survive the next three weeks that are so packed full of work and other busy stuff.

I’m wondering if I’ll spend all of May and June being bored out of my mind because I’ll be all! done! working! (unlikely)

I’m wondering when this crazy “Mama only” phase will end and my spunky, happy child will return without me having to worry about her flipping out when I walk out of her sight.

I’m wondering why I spent Easter weekend eating as though I am eating for 200 instead of eating for 2.

I’m wondering why I’m even bothering to write this post because it’s kind of stupid.

I’m wondering if I’ll ever sleep again.

I’m wondering who this little one inside me will be.

That’s what’s going on inside my crazy brain. What about you?

Easter 2012

Welcome to the 582747th Easter recap that is floating around blog land today. I hope you enjoy your stay.

We spent Easter weekend at my parent’s cottage and had a wonderful time, as always. Evalyn had a blast with her cousins, hunting for Easter eggs, chilling by the “pond” and bossing her Nana around (ahem, “Come here now sweetie”).

There’s not much to say so I’ll just let the photos do the talking.

(Oh yeah, any tips on getting photos of your toddler that don't make her look like she’s constipated? I even tried the “Sit nice for a picture and I’ll give you another chocolate” trick … no luck.)

The Easter Egg hunt!

Cousin time. Yeah, the boy cousin was there, too, but apparently he moves too fast to get captured in any photos without being a complete blur.

Someone gets her love for the outdoors from her Daddy-io. Nothing like exploring in the woods, throwing rocks in the “pond” and playing in the playhouse!

I hope you all had a fantastic Easter celebration with your loved ones.