Friday, August 10, 2012

If These Walls Could Talk

I’ve been thinking about the day I’d write this post for months. Maybe even years. In my head, I’ve been thinking about how I would convey these ideas for as long as I can remember.

For me, buying our first home has been such a bittersweet experience. Yes, I am stoked to have our own place. We’re ready. We’ve been saving and planning for this for years. I’m ready for that. Yet at the same time, the apartment we’ve been living in for the past 5 1/2 years isn’t just any old place that we’ve been killing time. It’s not a crappy high rise building that allows us no space of our own.

The place we’ve been living up until now, although not owned by us, is our home. Our first home, really. Although we did live in one teensy weensy basement apartment in town for a few months right after we got married, this is the place we will remember when we think about our first home.

And so as I’ve spent the last few weeks/months thinking about the prospect of moving and planning for that to happen, I’ve started thinking about so many of the stories that are contained within the walls of this home.

If these walls could talk, they would tell of a young, newly married, head over heels couple who found themselves without a home just three months into their marriage due to a flood in their first apartment.

They would tell of a young woman who was in the midst of undergraduate exams, stressing over finding a place to live and feeling heart broken over having no place to spend their first Christmas together.

They would tell of a generous and gracious family who made accommodations for this young couple to move in within a week, in order to be settled and comfortable before the holidays.


They would go on to tell of years and years of generosity and kindness being bestowed on the young couple by the family who lives upstairs.

If these walls could talk, they would tell of a tiny little black lab, border collie mix who stole the heart of a girl who hated dogs and became her first baby. They would tell of weeks of sleepless nights, house training and cuddling as the dog hater fell in love with her sweet little puppy.

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They would tell of years of writing papers, studying for exams, preparing grant proposals, applying for grad school, conducting field work, writing and defending two theses. They would tell of a BA and an MA. They would tell of a husband who supported his wife through it all.


If these walls could talk, they would tell of a wife peeing on a stick on a total whim at 6 am one Sunday morning and then startling her husband awake as she jumped on him and screamed, “We’re having a baby!”

They would tell of nine months where a couple grew together in anticipation of their first child’s arrival. They would tell of morning sickness, nursery decorating, belly kicking and some hot, hot summer days that resulted in the wife cooking dinner in her skivvies.

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If these walls could talk they would tell of a husband and wife making big decisions for the man to leave a steady, consistent job in order to follow his dreams and start a business of his own, doing what he loves most. They would tell of the best decision they ever made.

If these walls could talk, they would speak of this couple laying their eyes on their first born daughter for the first time when she was brought into the world on their very own bed. They would tell of this couple becoming a family as they fell head over heels in love with a tiny 7lb 10 oz package that they called their own.

2010-09-23 Eva's Birth

If these walls could talk, they would tell of sleepless nights, breast feeding battles, excitement over milestones and a deeper joy than can ever be explained as this family experienced the first year of one little girl’s life together. They would tell of first smiles, first steps and first words.

If these walls could talk, they would tell of this couple’s decision to add another child to the family. They would tell, once again, of a wife taking pregnancy tests and sharing, with excitement and with her one year old by her side, the news that her husband would be a father one more time.

Baby #21

If these walls could talk, they would tell of another pregnancy filled with (more) morning sickness, anticipation and eager excitement. They would tell of an overwhelming joy that was experienced as they prepared to make their first baby a Big Sister.

If these walls could talk, they would tell of the stress and anxiety and excitement over purchasing their first home.

If these walls could talk, they would tell of the birth of a second beautiful, beautiful baby girl. They would tell of a mom, and a dad, and a little girl all falling head over heels in love with the newest member of their clan.

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If these walls could talk, they would tell of five anniversaries, six Christmases, thirteen birthdays, two mother’s days and two father’s days, along with countless other holidays and celebrations – all celebrated together.

They would tell of a couple who loved hard, fought hard, worked hard and prayed hard. They would tell of tough times and of fun times. They would tell of joy and of pain. They would tell of mountains and valleys.

If these walls could talk, they would tell you of a young family who developed their roots in this home.

Tonight, we will sleep in this home for the last time. The home that has been so formative in building “us”. The only home my girls have ever known. And that, for me, is oh so bitter sweet. So, as I look around and see empty walls looking back at me, I know they are not empty. Not at all.

If these walls could talk, they would tell you that they are filled with the stories of us.


Lucky in Love said...

Love this. Such great memories y'all have made in your first home. Can you even begin to imagine the memories you'll make in the next one? So excited to find out! Love you sweetie!

Moe said...

This was so sweet. I'm crying at my desk. I absolutely loved this post. I hope you all enjoy your last night in your 1st home. :)

Katie @ Loves of Life said...

love this, special and so sweet. I would feel that way if/when we leave this home. But the thing is, the only home your girls WILL remember is this next one. It will be so so so special to them. Hugs this weekend! thinking of you!

Aunt Shelley said...

So sweet...sniff sniff. But just think of how the new walls are gonna SHOUT!! There's so much ahead for you guys. While cleaning your new floor I found a spot of blood...sorry but for now I left it there as witness to what great hubbies we have. What would we do without such hard workers.

Melissa at Tall Blonde Blog said...

Just love this. Beautiful post!

Samantha said...

Love this post. This and your birth stories and love story are my favorites. Can't wait to see your new place and all the adventures that will go with it!

SEL said...

Beautiful post! Cogratulations and best of luck on this new chapter in your life. So exciting!

{annie_loo} said...

Girl! It's hard. The hardest part is walking out for the last time. Once I was out, I missed our house for about a week, but once settled in the apartment it was easier. You'll always have fond memories of that home. THere will never be another 'first home' but there will always be room for more memories, laughter, love and FUN!!! Good luck momma! Take it easy!

Anonymous said...

Love this post. So many great memories! I often think of how eager I am to get out of here, but once it's time to leave, I'll miss a lot of memories. Now, you get to make so many more memories in your new home. :)

Mumma said...

Ok - I am not supposed to cry at work :-)
So many special memories made there for us all!!!

SnoWhite said...

Moving is bittersweet; but you take all the memories with you. I remember so many of these moments - thanks for sharing them with your friends!!

Meagan said...

Love this! Extra special that you had both girls in that home! I will be a wreck when we leave our first home. Something about the place you bring your baby home to. The place that is filled with that pitter patter I cherish so much!

Jackie said...

You missed your calling, dear friend. Lots of tears and it's not even my home. :) so when are you writing a book? LOVE this post. Praying everything goes smoothly.

Deanna said...

Such a sweet post! I'm sure you'll build lots of great memories in your new home while always treasuring the special ones from your first. :)

Anonymous said...

This is probably one of the best posts I have read on the internet in a long time. Love it!

Erin said...

You've got me in tears. Such beautiful memories. So happy for your family as you embark on a new chapter of memories!

Katie said...

This was exactly how I felt when we left our first home. I still get a little sad when we drive by and a little part of me wishes we could re-live those sweet days in that house. But that being said, our current house is awesome and it is great making memories here. I'm sure it will be the same for you!

Anonymous said...

Aww, what a sweet post! Hope you enjoyed the last night in your first home.

Jaclyn_Rose said...

So sweet! I have moved so often already with my two little ones that we never had that, but hopefully we will have that in this house!

Good luck with the move and transition

Penny said...

It's so hard moving, even if it's to somewhere awesome!! =) There are so many memories in a home. My best friend just moved, and she JUST blogged about her new home -- I think you'll get something from it. =)

Perfectly Imperfect said...

wow. this almost made me cry and it's not my house. what a special time in your lives and how great to be able to look back with such fondness.