surviving the bedtime crazy: part 2.0

A few months ago I wrote this post highlighting the challenges in surviving the evening hours with two two and under on my own. Since then, I’ve been fortunate enough to have had way fewer evenings where this is necessary. The late fall and winter months mean work is less busy and there is less going on in the evenings for Evan, which means there are two to tackle bedtime more often. This makes mama happen.

Over the last three weeks, however, Evan’s been doing some work at our church which means he has been spoken for most evenings. So, once again, I’ve had to find my groove at doing the whole bedtime thing solo. What I’ve learned over the past few weeks is that now, surviving bedtime with the two of them? Piece of cake. Surviving mealtime, on the other hand? That’ll take me down. That’s a different story, though. My purpose in this post is to give an update on the whole bedtime thing now that I’ve got a few more months under my belt.

There are a few key reasons why bedtime seems to be much smoother.

First, bathtime. Gwen can now sit up and move around easily in the tub. I am not afraid of her sister crushing her or smothering her. This means dual bath time is possible and way less stressful than it used to be. Secondly, Gwen no longer freaks out the second she gets lifted out of the tub, expecting a boob to be in her mouth within a matter of milliseconds. This means that I can take the girls straight from dinner to the tub. Or, at least put them in the tub earlier in the evening as opposed to just before bed, even if not right after dinner. I bath them together, get Gwen out and PJed first, while E continues to play and cleans up the bath toys and then get her out and PJed.

Second, their bedtimes have adjusted. At the time that I wrote that previous post, both girls were going to bed between 7:30-7:45 which made it tricky to accomplish bedtime routines for both. Now, Gwen is in bed, asleep by 6:45-7 and Eva still goes to bed by 7:30-7:45. When I wrote the first post about the bedtime stuff, I was hesitant about having Gwen’s bedtime be earlier than Eva’s since I cherished that one on one cuddle time with her. I do miss that. I miss being able to nurse her and sit in the nursery holding her, sometimes for as long as an hour, before laying her down. But the good thing is that she usually makes her way into my bed in the wee hours of the morning anyway, so we still get that cuddle time. She also wakes up earlier than Eva most mornings, so we get some nice one on one before the Big Sissy is awake.

And lastly, Gwen no longer takes forever to go to sleep. She nurses for 3-4 minutes, and if she’s not already asleep when she’s done, as soon as I lay her down with her pacifier, she’s down for the count. There are very few nights (KNOCK ON WOOD AS HARD AS I CAN) that she puts up a fight to go to sleep. If she doesn’t immediately go to sleep, it usually doesn’t take a lot of effort, other than slipping the paci back into her mouth, or laying her back down if she’s standing up.

So, now, it usually goes like this. I can get both of the girls bathed and PJed by 6:30-6:45 and if it’s not bath night, it’s even smoother. Although bath night is a welcome distraction to kill some time between supper and bed. Often, Gwen has a bath every night and if Eva wants to join her she can but she doesn’t always. After PJs are done, we play for a while longer until Gwen starts to fuss. Then, if Eva is engrossed in something I just leave her be. If she needs a distraction, I’ll throw a bowl of crackers at her and turn on a show. Either way, it’s not a huge deal since Gwen nurses so quickly anyway. I’ve had nights where Eva just doesn’t seem to want to be distracted while I’m putting Gwen to bed and she has stood in the nursery beside us. So far, though, that hasn’t bothered Gwen and she still goes to sleep.

Then, when that’s done, I still have a good 30-40 minutes until Eva goes to bed. Depending on the night, she and I might have a shower (sometimes this is my best option for actually getting a shower myself), or I will clean up from dinner while she plays if I haven’t had a chance to. She may have a snack and watch a show or else we’ll do potty, pull up, teeth brushing and snuggle in her bed for a books and songs for a longer time before bed.

The spacing in the bedtimes has made it oh so much easier. So much. Eliminating my need to basically toss one kid into their bed and run to the next makes the evening quieter, more peaceful and less “I wanna pull all my hair out and then drown myself in chocolate”. Although, if I’m being totally honest, I do often feel that way anyway.

This new set up, with the earlier bedtime for the babe, makes the whole “bedtime” thing take much longer but also makes it a far less chaotic time. For now, when it’s dark and cold and icky and we wouldn’t be outside anyway, it works well. When summer comes and evenings are spent outside, we’ll see how it goes, as I’m sure Eva won’t be as interested in coming inside when Sissy has to go to bed. For now, though … you’ll be hearing no complaints from me.

happenings

I’ve been so scarce around here lately. I didn’t really mean for that to happen but, well, you know – it happened. Life happened. The biggest thing that has kept me away from here lately is that I’ve been up to my eyeballs in potty training for the last week. Many of you know already, but last Wednesday when I picked Evalyn up from school her teacher told me she’d been doing great during bathroom time. When she saw I surprised she said, “Oh? Aren’t you training at home?” … when I told her we weren’t, she said that Miss Eva had told her that she goes pee on the potty at home. LIAR. Anyway, when we got home that day, E told me she needed to use the potty. And did it. And basically hasn’t looked back since. This deserves a post of it’s own and there will be one next week so I’ll just leave it here – there are ups and downs and we’re by no means “finished” potty training but overall, we are very proud of her and she’s doing marvelously.

Add the mess that is DST to the mix and I’ve basically been down for the count. We are all tired. Exhausted, really. And up until yesterday, the girls and I were suffering from a huge case of cabin fever due to the self imposed potty training house arrest. Hopefully the next few days will help the girls (especially Evalyn) get back on track with their normal routines and schedules so we can all feel a bit more rested again. Why is it that they have no problem adjusting back to the 7:30 bedtime but they still want to get up an hour (or more, hello 4 am mornings!) early? No fair. I feel more tired than I have throughout Gwen’s entire life. Motherhood is constant, isn’t it, though?

Amidst all of this our sweet Gwennie turned four months old last Friday. Trust me, I have not forgotten this. I swear I’m not giving into the second child syndrome clichés. I have all of her pictures selected and ready to go but was purposefully leaving the post for today because we had her appointment this morning and I wanted to include her stats. But then we ended up hanging out with our Buds today so alas, no post. Tomorrow the girls and I head to Nana and Papa’s for the weekend and following that we will have SIL and niece here for a few days. All of this means I probably won’t be back until all of that simmers down. But when I’m back? Watch out. Because I’ll be back.

surviving the bedtime crazy

Because of Evan’s job and everything with the house and so on, I am solo for bedtime a lot of the time. Not all of the time, and not nearly as much now that we are actually in our house, but sometimes. And for me, since becoming a mom of 2, this has been the most difficult and challenging aspect to conquer. I cannot figure out how to get through the hours from 6-8pm when I’m on my own and come out of it still standing on two feet. Sure, the bedtime crazy hasn’t done me in yet, but I feel like it’s come pretty close some days.

The thing is, the further and further we go, the earlier and earlier Gwen likes to go to bed. So while we seem to be (thankfully) past the time of crazy fussiness in the evening, I’m now facing the challenge of how to get them both in bed at essentially the exact same time. I’ve been trying a variation of different things, mixing up our routine, adjusting the order of things, trying to adjust nap schedules and so on – all in hopes of figuring out a system that will help me get through the evenings without feeling quite as frazzled. All of you experienced moms are probably sitting there laughing at me. Developing a system? Figuring out a routine? Getting through bedtime without being frazzled? Clearly, I’m expecting far too much.

Anyway, over the past 3 something months, I’ve figured out a few things that work and a few that don’t. One thing I’ve had to teach myself is that it’s okay to mix up the routine a bit. Especially with Evalyn. When she was an infant I was a stickler for her evening routine. I was terrified that if I strayed, it would mess up her sleep. Now I laugh at myself for this fear. Girlfriend didn’t sleep through the night until she was a year old. So what exactly was I afraid of messing up??

So now, although I like to keep a semblance of a routine in the evenings, I’ve learned that it’s okay to toss it up a bit. Gwen often (not always) has a good evening nap starting anywhere between 5-6 and ending anywhere between 6-7. These nights are the nights that I don’t struggle as much to get through the bedtime crazy. Obviously. So, on these nights, if Eva needs a bath, I give her one right after supper and then she plays in her PJs until snack/bedtime. There’s no reason why her bath has to be immediately before bedtime like it used to be. This way, by the time Gwen is up, Eva is all ready to go. Just needs a snack. Because of the good nap, too, Gwen is usually happy and okay with being relegated to the play mat while I tuck Eva in. If she’s not pumped, she comes with me into her room and we all do prayers and songs together. Then as soon as Eva’s tucked in, I move on to bath, PJs, nursing and bed for Gwen. Thankfully, she’s chill and loves sleep and even if she naps until 7pm she has no problem being back in bed and asleep by 7:45.

On the evenings that Gwen doesn’t have a good nap? Well, that’s a whole-notha-story! These are the nights that I want to hide under a blanket and let the girls put themselves to bed. Not only does it mean that Gwen is usually fussy but it also means that she’ll be ready for bed earlier – probably RIGHT when Eva is, not 10-15 minutes after like normal. If it is bath night, I have started bathing them together – which makes a huge difference. The set up is not ideal but it works. I stick Gwen’s baby tub IN the big tub, fill it up and also fill up the tub itself with a bit of water for Eva. She doesn’t care if she doesn’t get much water. She just likes being in there with her sister. I make sure to have everyone’s towels, lotions, diapers, PJs and Gwen’s bouncy seat in the room with me before we start since I know I won’t be able to leave the room to attend to one while the other is still in there. I clean Gwen first and then get her out while Evalyn continues to play. I lotion, PJ and bouncy seat her in record time and then move on to washing, drying, loitoning and PJing Eva. These nights get a little hairy as Gwen expects the b00b ASAP after getting her PJs on, so she gets quite cranky in the meantime.

These are the nights when Evalyn’s bedtime gets rushed and frantic, which I hate. But, what can I do? I go back and forth between popping Gwen’s paci in her mouth while she’s screaming her head off and frantically reading a book, saying a prayer and singing one verse of the shortest song I know to Evalyn. Coincidentally, these are also the nights that Eva usually takes forever to fall asleep.

Although I’m sure the day will soon come when I have no choice, I haven’t yet jumped to putting Gwen down before Evalyn. My reason is both selfish and logical. Number one (logical reason), it takes way more effort to put Gwen down. It involves 10-15 minutes of nursing, some cuddling and rocking and so on. Number two (selfish reason), I love this time to be peaceful, quiet and dark – laying in my bed, alone together. Obviously we wouldn’t be able to keep it up that way with the Tasmanian Toddler running around.

Of course, once Gwen drops her evening nap, there’s a good chance she will need to go to bed before 7:45, and so I’ll have to make those adjustments. But for now, 7:45 is a good time. It works for her. It works for Eva. And, it works for me – even if it means I’m sweating and have an accelerated heart beat by the time it’s all done.

So, any tips? Anything you’ve done to help manage the bedtime chaos a little better when you’re solo?

it’s easier. and it’s harder.

Since becoming a mom of two, I have found that one of the most common questions I’m asked is, “Is having two kids easier or harder than having one?” I find this a tricky question to answer. In short, my answer is having two kids is easier than having one kid. And it’s harder than having one kid. How is that even possible? I’m not sure.

You see, it’s like this. Having two kids who are less than two years apart in age is crazy. Of course, I’m sure having two kids who are any space in age is crazy – but this is my experience. The only experience I know. My days are jam packed full of diapers, spit up, sippy cups, breast feeding, temper tantrums, Diego, silly songs and messes. My days are also full of cuddles, dance parties, long afternoon naps and sweet, sleepy bedtime snuggles. It’s exhausting and constant. But, even more than that, it’s rewarding and fulfilling. Some days, at the end of the day, when I find myself laying in bed, I feel like the day that just passed is a haze. Sometimes, I’m not even sure what all happened between my feet hitting the floor in the morning and my head hitting the pillow at night. Sometimes, I feel like I’m struggling to keep my head above the water. And those days, those are the ones where I feel like having two kids is harder than having one.

When I stand in this crazy, chaotic place that I am right now, with a two year old and a three month old and I look back on the days when I had “just” a 3 month old, yes, I admit, I sometimes think and probably say … “Wow. Having just one kid was so easy”. Just this morning I went shopping with Gwen while Eva was in preschool and I thought multiple times how easy it is to shop with just an infant. No goldfish crackers flying at the stranger next to me, no arguments about if we should walk or go in the stroller, none of that. Just a quiet baby in an ergo who was happy to be along for the ride. But the thing is this – I would never in my life want to invalidate the feelings of a first time mom by saying those things. I would never want to be the one to say, just you wait because having just one kid is sooo easy.

Because heaven knows that 2ish years ago, if you had looked at me, you’d have known that it wasn’t easy. It was anything but easy for me in the moment – when I was in the trenches. That’s why they say hindsight is 20/20. (I almost wrote hindsight is 50/50. Ha, Mom brain). But foresight is not.

When Eva was just 5 months old, I wrote this post. (I wrote the current post before I went back and re-read that post. Interestingly, in that post, I wrote the exact same line – hindsight is 20/20. Foresight is not.) In that post, I wrote about how my feelings as a first time mom had been invalidated by people who were quick to tell me just how easy I had it. And now that I sit here, in their position, I know that what they were saying was valid. But that doesn’t mean it was right or okay. Because it wasn’t. It was demeaning, invalidating and insensitive. And that is exactly what I would never want to do to another mom.

Time and experience are funny things. You can always look back on time and look back at past experiences to compare them to now but you can’t do it the opposite way. You cannot look ahead and to compare your current experience to something you have yet to experience. You cannot be a brand new mom of one baby and look ahead and know what it will be like to have two babies. Just like I can’t, as a mom of two, look ahead and know what it will be like to have three babies.

Now, I can sit here and look back at the days when I had one baby and realize aspects of it that were easier. Easier than what though? Easier than what I’m experiencing now, but not easier than anything I had experienced then. So I can also recognize that at the time I was experiencing them, they were not easier … because it was the first time I had done anything like it.

My adjustment to two kids has been alright. Not perfect. Not completely stress free. But alright.

My adjustment to two kids has definitely been way easier than my adjustment to one kid. I’ve had these conversations with a few of my friends/family members who are on kid #1. Some of them have said that they feel like they can hardly get anything done with one kid so how can I manage to get dinner on the table with two kids?

The thing is this – before Eva was born, my life was kid free. Before Gwen was born, my life was already kid filled. I had already adjusted to the life style that is dictated by nap schedules, meal times, children’s activities and so on. I was already used to being home by 7 every single evening of the week to get a kid to bed. I was already used to having very limited one on one time with my husband. I was already used to spending many days of the week in the house, without ever going anywhere. I was already used to having to get some kind of food on the table for the sake of my child, even if it was the last thing I wanted to do. I was already used to all of these things.

And that’s why, for me, the adjustment to two kids has been easier than the adjustment to one kid.

When Evalyn was 3 months old and I had “just” one baby to look after, most days I could hardly manage to change my underpants. My teeth went unbrushed, my hair unwashed, the house was usually a mess and getting dinner for my husband was quite often an after thought. Because I was in the throes of sorting out this whole motherhood thing, adjusting to the different dynamics in my marriage, figuring out how to function as a zombie and all in all – attempting to reconcile who this new person looking in the mirror at me was. Figuring out what it meant to be Mom.

By the time Gwen came around, I had assimilated myself into that role already. I am already Mom. I am used to having dirty hair and wearing the same yoga pants for eighteen days straight. My standards for keeping up my house have changed drastically. I’ve learned to embrace and accept the constant chaos and the occasional ahem, never ending dust bunny that collects under the couch.

It wasn’t as earth shattering to add a baby this time because the pace, the flow and the dynamic of this family, of my life, of my identity – all of that already revolves around little people and everything that comes with them.

So yeah, having two kids is harder than having one. And having two kids is easier than having one. I’m not sure if that’s the right answer. But then again, I’m not sure if it’s the right question either.

Enjoying You

When I was pregnant with Gwen, I often lamented over the fact that I feared I wouldn’t be able to enjoy her in the same way I had been able to enjoy her big sister. I worried that because I also had a toddler to chase and would have limited one on one, quiet time with the baby, that somehow, the relationship we developed through her infancy would be less intimate, less close and less enjoyable.

Boy, was I wrong.

So wrong.

Here we are almost eight weeks in and let me tell you, I am enjoying this baby to the fullest.

Dare I say, I may even be enjoying her infancy more than I did Evalyn’s. When I look back on Evalyn’s early days, I look back with fondness. I loved those days. But, at the same time, they were hard. Many days, I was wracked with anxiety, uncertainty and stress. I didn’t have a clue what I was doing. And it’s not to say that there haven’t been bad days since Gwen was born or that I’m an expert now, but I just feel so laid back this time around.

With Eva, I was so concerned about the sleeping thing, so nervous that she would never ever fall asleep on her own that I feel like I didn’t hold her, cuddle her, snuggle her near enough. I worried that if I let her go too long between feeds, she’d starve. If I didn’t wait until it had been three full hours, she’d nurse every hour for the rest of her life. If she slept in my bed, she’d never like her crib. If she missed a nap, the night would be ruined. I worried so much about these things, that I feel like we missed out, just a little bit. Since I blinked and she transformed from a tiny baby to an almost two year old, I know how fast these days go. Despite the fact that some days may be long, the moments are fleeting and the months and years zoom on past.

I won’t let Gwennie’s babyness disappear before my eyes without taking every chance I get to soak up every little bit of her. So that means on days like yesterday – when the fridge breaks and I need to clean the downstairs fridge to get it ready to be moved upstairs but it’s impossible to do because she only wants to sleep being held in my arms or in the ergo, or when the laundry doesn’t get folded until 11 pm, or dinner barely makes it to the table – it means on days like those, I let it all go, and I snuggle. I hold. I cuddle. And instead of getting worked up about all that is not getting done, I focus on feeling her sweet little heart beating pressed up against mine. I close my eyes and sniff in the newborn scent that I know will disappear to quickly. I stroke her little tufts of hair that I know will become pig tails before too long. I cherish the stillness and the cuddles and the tiny little human laying beside me.

Because I know that I will turn away for a second and when I turn back, she will be running around, keeping up with her big sister and I will be willing her to slow down, to stop, to climb up on my lap and cuddle. Just for a second.

So for now, the rest can wait.

Because for now, sweet Gwen, I am enjoying you.

A Week of Gwen

I’m taking a break from the birth story (I’m sorry – I promise it will get done in the next couple of days) to write a bit of an update on how life with two under two is going so far. Because, if you can believe it, our sweet little Gwen is already seven days old.

And in seven short days, she has completely and utterly stolen my heart – changing me forever.

How can I not feel blessed?

The Babe

I could write “Dream Baby” here and nothing else and it would basically sum up our experience with Gwen so far. Seriously. She has been nothing but blissful. Knock on wood. She has made this transition so much easier for me (well, that and the excessive amount of help I’ve had – more on that later). She is eating and sleeping like a champ. From the very first feed, she latched well and started gulping and hasn’t stopped since. My milk came in in less than 48 hours which made her quite happy. Of course, there is the expected tenderness until my n*ps get used to all the action again, but overall, it is going so well. Within one day I felt as though Gwen and I were where it took Eva and I weeks to get to. I can already nurse side lying, in the dark and – get this – with a shirt on! Huge people. This is huge.

As far as sleep goes, her very first night was horrific. She slept no longer than 10 minutes at any given time. But apparently she was just sorting out some kinks because since then, she has slept a minimum of 5.5 hours every night and the past two nights, she even did NINE (YES NINE) hours. I know this is too good to be true and won’t last. I am not naive. But I’m afraid she will keep it up long enough to make me think it just might be the norm and then she’ll start laughing in my face. So, for now, I am just convincing myself it’s not the norm and enjoying the rest while I can get it.

My midwife came here for our one week postpartum check and she is doing great. She has zoomed past her birth weight and is now weighing 8lbs 7oz. She nurses often, very often, during the day. Usually every 1-2 hours, but she sometimes gives me one 3 hour break in the afternoon.

She’s been a busy bee in her first week. She’s been shopping twice already and has been to church. She’s met lots of friends and family and has been loved on by so many people. We are so blessed to have so many people who are just as head over heels in love with her as we are.

The Big Sis

I cannot even believe how well Evalyn has been adjusting so far. A friend and I were talking the other day and discussing how sometimes when we are concerned about how life changes will impact our children, it’s often us who have a more difficult time than they do. And that has certainly been the case so far.

The experience of watching my Baby Girl become the Big Sister when welcoming Gwen has been amazing. It deserves a post of it’s own, which I’m sure it will get very soon.

From the first minute she saw Gwennie at 7 hours old, she has been in love with her baby sister. She wants to “hold him”, “kiss him yittle bit” and so on (yes – Gwennie is a him apparently). At first she struggled with her name a little bit. She would flip between calling her Gwennie, Connor (her cousin) and Silas (who our baby would have been had he been a boy). It took a few days but she’s figured it out and now it’s all about “Baby Gwennie”.

She is very interested and protective. She hasn’t yet shown any jealousy when I have the baby or am nursing – she just always wants to be around and see what’s going on. She has had a few instances where she’s gotten upset over someone else other than Mommy holding Baby Gwennie – but we’re working on that.

She tells her a “secret: I yuh you” and calls her “honey girl”, “darling”, “pumpkin pie” and all of the other terms of endearment that she hears us call her. First thing every morning she wants to go see Baby Gwennie. She is just absolutely in love.

The Mama

I am doing great. Recovery has been a breeze this time. I hardly had any damage during birth, so that has obviously made things much easier. Add to that the fact that we have been getting amazing sleep, I have had non stop help and she is nursing so beautifully and I definitely do not feel like I gave birth one week ago.

The Dada

As was expected, Evan has fallen into his role of Daddy of two seamlessly. He wasn’t able to take much time off, but he has been home as often as possible and has been a huge help with Evalyn in the mornings and with Gwen in the evenings. He is absolutely smitten by his girls and I will always stand by my belief that my greatest gift in motherhood is watching the relationship develop between him and his daughters.

Everything Else

We have been very (VERY) lucky to have my mom here until today. She’s currently snuggling with Gwen for a few more minutes before she packs up to head home. I’m still in denial. Thankfully, Evan’s mom is on her way so we are getting ready to do the big old switch. I’m feeling very anxious about how I will deal with both of the girls on my own once she leaves, but I guess a few other women in the world have survived this, so will I.

The extra help has been monumental in my adjustment. I have basically had to do nothing for myself until now and I truly believe that it has helped ease Evalyn into her role as Big Sister so much. I’m just so glad she’s still been able to have fun and enjoy her usual activities despite the fact that Mama is tied up with a baby on her boob all day.

In some ways, Gwen has always been here. In other ways, it seems like just yesterday she joined our family. We are smitten with our little chunky monkey and she has already changed our lives.

Some Things on Monday

On the weekend, Evan and I got to take the evening and go on a splendid date together. It will, more than likely, be our last before Bambino #2 arrives, so I soaked it up to the fullest.

We did it up romantic style by going to the States and hitting up Lowe’s for paint for the new house and Target for nursing bras, newborn diapers and maxi pads. We also came home with a stack of paint chips a mile high. The definition of “date” sure has changed.

Evan was trying to hurry me along in Target (world’s worst mistake a husband can make) so I sent him and my pharmacy item list off to gather things while I tried on nursing bras and camisoles. I was just trying to do him a favour by killing two birds with one stone. Of course, when I tracked him down after I was finished in the fitting room, I was told that “Target didn’t have anything that was on my list and the only things he managed to find were a case of beer and four cases of pop. Besides, do you know how many types of pads there are?” Men.

At least we finished the night off by enjoying a delicious dinner on the patio at The Cheesecake Factory. Spending nearly two hours, uninterrupted, on a gorgeous night on the patio? Perfection.

The nicest part about the date was that Evalyn was at a sleepover at her Auntie’s (for the very first time) so we had absolutely no time pressure. It was really nice. Just to be. Us. For a few hours, no diapers, no singing Happy And You Know It, no sippy cups and no snack traps. Just me and my husband. Bliss.

~~

Another important thing happened this weekend – I realized that I’ve reached ‘that point’ in pregnancy. You know? The point where complete strangers look at you in public and their face reads “Oh. Oh, dear. You poor thing”. Clearly, I’m waddling.

It started on Friday night when I visited a fresh new snuggly at the L&D department in our local hospital. Pretty sure at least four nurses and one hundred other people in that hallway were looking at me like, “Hm, are you here or are you just here?”

Then at the mall, I watched a security guard keep his eyes close on me as I waddled walked past him looking for my husband. I’m not sure if he thought he was going to have to catch my baby or what.

But, honestly. Maybe it’s just my heightened self-consciousness. Probably not.

~~

I’ve already reached the point in pregnancy where clothes? Yea. They just don’t really work so well anymore. The tops I wore right until 40w5d with Evalyn barely stretch over my belly anymore. So, coming up with a decent outfit to go out in public in can be a challenge. Thankfully, my husband is helpful. And honest. Some women may not like the level of honesty I get from my husband, but me personally? I’d rather him tell me if something makes me look like a whale than let me go out in public and pretend I look fabulous.

So when I got dressed on Saturday night for our date and came out of the room to get his opinion, I was appreciative of the fact that he told me the outfit didn’t really work so well on the current configuration of my body. What I was not appreciative of, however? The fact that I wore the exact same outfit one week ago without him seeing it. Fail.

~~

Yesterday we celebrated the upcoming arrival of one of my BFF’s first babies at a lovely baby shower. We managed to wrangle together the four of us besties and our off spring for a photo op. Notice a trend?

And, no, the one second from left is not already lactating. It’s just baby drool. I can’t tell you how I’m excited that we’re all sharing this journey together. William is currently 5.5 months and with the other 3 on the way, we’ll all welcome our little ones within 9 months of each other. Awesome, right?

We’re hoping for 4 boys so we can start putting together an awesome hockey team.

Updates

I’ve been sparse around here lately. Other than sharing the news about our house and a few little kidlet updates, I haven’t had much to write about. I guess you can say I’ve been living the moments instead of sitting down to blog about them. And by living the moments, I mean grading papers. Because honestly? What’s really kept me away from blogging is the ginormous stacks of papers taunting me. Work has been insane, yo. But speaking of that, first update: I’m almost done. I just picked up my last set of papers today and if all goes according to plan I should have them all done by Friday.

Then? Work is done. Done done done. And I’ll be able to focus on my tot, getting my house packed up, planning for renovations and birthing a child. And the best part? If all goes as planned, I won’t be returning to work for 15 months after s/he is born. Keeping my fingers crossed on that one.

~~

Next up, I promise I shall post some photos of the new joint soon. I’m starting to get really excited about what we’re going to do with each room. And with every ounce of excitement, comes another pound of anxiety.

~~

A few months ago I blogged about our horrific pool experience when I took Evalyn back to the pool after a 6 month hiatus? Remember that? Well, what I haven’t blogged about since is that immediately after that I decided to try to kick that fear to the curb and signed her up for swim lessons. We started 6 weeks ago. Today was the first day that she really, really enjoyed it. Sure, it’s gotten progressively better each week, but today was like magic. There was not a single tear. No “all done”s screamed for 30 minutes straight. No “sit down there”s while pointing to the benches on the side of the pool. Just splashing, kicking, following instructions and having fun. Today she even took four turns down the slide, and when she had a positive reaction all of the other parents, who have been witnessing the painfulness for the past month or so, cheered and hoorayed for her. It was sweet. And the best part? As we were pulling out of the parking lot, I heard her little voice from the backseat say, “Mommy? Mommy? Thank you. Thank you swimming”. Melt.My.Heart.

~~

Another little tidbit about her – this stage? The 17-19ish month stage? THE BEST EVER. Sure, it’s trying. She’s testing the limits. Learning how to assert her independence. Trying to see what’s what. But amidst all of that? She is just so stinking fun. We can have conversations. We sing songs together. We play pretend. And it is amazing. She amazes me and fills my heart in so many ways every day. Like today when I walked in the door after a late evening at work and she ran to me, lifted my shirt and said “Hi my broser! My sitter!”

~~

I’m now in the single digit countdown for weeks left in this pregnancy. It’s a funny feeling. Like, I feel like the baby will be here in no time at all. Yet at the same time 2+ more months of pregnancy feels like an eternity. Am I the only one who feels/has felt that way?

~~

I know when I set out to write this post, I had a few more things that I had planned to write updates on. But, of course, I forget what they are. So for now, I’m heading out to watch my belly dance.

Oops. I wrote a weekend re-cap

This weekend was good. Just oh so good. I don’t normally do weekend recaps but here I am, 8:20 on Sunday evening, with my husband snoring his face off on the couch, and I can’t help but think that so much good happened this weekend. Nothing overly spectacular, but just good. It started out with a quick, impromptu trip across the border with my two favourite people – the hubby and the child. And let me tell you, successful trip indeed. We picked up the first year photo book that I put a ton of time into making for Evalyn. I had been so anxious to get my hands on it. And? I am so, so happy. It turned out so well that I may or may not have cried when looking through it for the first time. And second time. And hundredth time.

After that, the night got even better as I scarfed my face with my beloved Chipotle. It’s probably a good thing that this chain doesn’t exist in my country. That, my friends, could be bad news. Pass the guacamole!

Once I had my fill of chips and guacmole, I rolled myself two doors down to Carter’s where I totally scored some sweet deals on Evalyn’s wardrobe for next fall/winter. I realize I am so lucky that I have been able to fairly accurately predict her sizes for upcoming seasons. Because, 12 pairs of leggings, 6 PJs, a skirt, a poncho, 2 sweaters and 3 tops for $96? THAT is a darn good deal.

We finished the night off with a quick trip to Target. Considering I only get to go there once every few months, it was kind of a flop. But, what can you do when your shopping partner is having a meltdown and whining to go home? (Oh, and Evalyn was ready to leave, too). I did snag myself a lovely, much needed, new pair of maternity jeans.

When a weekend starts like that, with a trip to the states with zero wait at the border, delicious food, and great deals? You know it’s gonna be a good one.

Saturday got even better. We had a quiet day at home and Evalyn and I played, and played, and played. We found out that my mom is planning to make a quick visit down here this week, so that added to the loveliness of the day. I caught up on paper work at the beginning of her nap and then climbed on in bed with my newest read: Divergent. (Read it? No. Go. Now. Start).

Saturday night is where it got really good. Our BFF’s Bigg Burd and C-Biscuit came over for dinner with their sweet little five week old William (or, Me-ooo, as Evalyn calls him) and I got me some newborn baby snuggles. When we spend time with them it makes me even more excited about the arrival of #2. Also, a little more nervous as the pre-bedtime portion of the evening was spent with me saying, “Oh. Be soft. His eyes are special. Don’t poke his eyes! No, honey, don’t sit on the baby’s face. Oh no, Eva, that ball is too big for William to play with. Don’t put it on him”. At least we’ve got lots of time for her practice and make him her guinea pig so she won’t do any real damage to her own baby. Kidding. Despite the craziness of trying to wrangle her off him the entire evening, once she went to bed, I got to spend hours laying on the couch, breathing in his sweet newborn smell, while he dozed and we watched movies.

And the best part? The very, very, very best part?

While we were snuggling, Baby C #2 seemed to get a lil’ jealous because I felt him/her move! Like crazy. I have been anxiously awaiting feeling movement since I know how amazing it is. I didn’t feel Evalyn until close to 22 weeks because of anterior placenta so I knew it could still be a while but I was hopeful that this one’s squirms would show up sooner. And looks as though my hope came true.

Today was church and lunch followed by a glorious three and a half hour nap for the babe while I snuggled in bed and polished off the last few chapters of Divergent. It was just all together a restful, enjoyable, satisfying weekend.

It’s these kind of weekends just make me feel all kinds of full heart happy.

Fifteen Months, Eight Days

Fifteen months, eight days marks the ending of my journey breastfeeding my firstborn baby. When Evalyn was born, it was my goal to breastfeed her for 12 months. When we got to her birthday, we were still going strong and neither of us was showing any desire to stop. So, we kept on keeping on. I started to think that it would be okay if we went to 18 months. Maybe even 2 years.

Then we decided to try to have another baby. And we succeeded. When I found out I was pregnant, I decided it was time to start weaning Evalyn. I knew I didn’t want to tandem nurse, although I know a number of women who do, and love it. I wanted to be sure to give Evalyn enough time to adjust to not being nursed before the baby arrived, to cut back on potential issues of regression, jealousy and so on. And, as I alluded to in my post on mama guilt, this decision was difficult. And caused me a lot of mama guilt.

I’m not sure why I felt so guilty. I know there was no reason to. I nursed her well past the initial goal I had set for us. I gave her what I felt was best for her for over a year of her life. But still, I had so many days where I felt like weaning was a selfish decision. Plus, I absolutely loved nursing that sweet girl, which meant the decision wasn’t just about taking something away from her. It was taking something away from me, too.

At the time we began weaning, Evalyn was nursing four times per day on a normal day. I started by gradually cutting out the two daytime feeds. When she woke from her naps, she would normally nurse, but instead I offered her a cup of milk. If she refused the cup and asked to nurse, I nursed her. For both day time feedings, however, it only took 3-5 days until she stopped asking. We then spent the next few months nursing right away in the morning and just before bed. It was amazing to me how quickly she completely forgot about nursing during the day, but still loved to at those two times. And, let me tell you, those two sessions were the hardest to fathom giving up. They were our still, quiet, peaceful moments together. Those moments don’t happen much with a busy toddler.

I told myself that I would start by cutting out the morning session first, at the beginning of December. It took me until about December 10th to actually take the leap and do it. When I did, it was the same, I offered her a cup instead of nursing and it only took two mornings until she stopped asking me to nurse when she got up.

The next few weeks, we enjoyed bedtime nursing. I knew by this point she wasn’t getting much milk from me but we were both still enjoying the few moments of quiet connectedness that we shared at the end of each day. Then, a few nights after we got home from our holidays, we were going through the bedtime routine, and it just happened. She had a bath. I put her PJs on. We sat down to read the bible. We prayed. I stood up to turn out the light. But, she didn’t ask for milk. And so I didn’t offer. I walked to her crib. Rocked her. Sang a few songs and laid her down as usual. Not a peep.

I came out of her room and immediately broke down and started to bawl. Honestly, I was doing the ugly face cry for about two hours. And I ate a lot of ice cream. This was the only time I hadn’t planned to cut out a session and it just happened on its own. I told Evan I felt like I hadn’t cherished the night before enough because I didn’t realize it would be my last. I wasn’t entirely sure why I was so emotional about it. It was my choice to wean and I had set January as my goal to be completely done. Yet, still, the ending of this journey was a difficult one to face.

Despite the fact we made it 15 months, despite the fact I will get to nurse another baby in a few months, despite the fact weaning was easy and she handled it like champ – the hurt was still there while I sat there and realized that I would never again nurse this child. She is growing up. It is natural. It is normal. It is part of life. But that doesn’t mean it has to be easy or without emotion. I felt like I needed to mourn the ending of this era. Yet, after my few hours of ugly crying, I felt like it was okay. I was okay with being done. I was ready to be done. The tears were behind me (until I sat down to write this post, of course).

I think the biggest difficulty lies in getting past the irrational thinking that because I’m done nursing, she no longer specifically needs me. I know how untrue this is. But after going through so many months of nursing, the only thing that was shared only between her and I, it’s sometimes hard to remember that the other ways I care for her are just as important, as well. She does still need me. She does still want me.

When she woke up that next morning, Evan got her from her crib and she immediately said “Mama”. He brought her into our room where I was still laying in bed. She saw me, laughed, clapped her hands and reached for me. When he handed her to me, she laid down on me, hugged me, kissed me and cuddled for (what felt like) longer than she ever had before. And that moment brought a lot of healing to my heart.

The Story

Evan and I have always knew that we wanted kids. Emphasis on the “s”. And, we always thought we wanted to have them close together. Then, when Evalyn, who was a great big giant wonderful surprise, came along, we weren’t sure what would happen with the spacing between our kids.

When she was an infant, I started to think I wanted to wait a few years until we added any more to the mix. Evan, on the other hand, was ready to get going when she was around six months old.

The problem was (is) the apartment we live in really isn’t big enough for another. I wanted to wait until we for sure had a house to move into before we started trying so we didn’t have the time pressure. He didn’t care so much.

But, right around her first birthday, I started getting the itch. We started discussing. Eventually, he convinced me that if we tried, and were successful, that we would figure it out. God would provide. He’s always provided for us up until now, we can trust that He will do the same as we continue.

So, we threw the pills out the window and as each day passed, I hoped more and more and more that we would be able to have another baby. Because of my work contract, and the rules of maternity leave in Canada, we had a very limited window to get pregnant in, or else we’d likely want to wait another year.

I wasn’t sure what to expect since, you know, “things” haven’t been quite the same since Eva was born. Needless to say, after a week or more of going between “I think I must be pregnant” to “No way, I’m definitely not pregnant” and seeing a number of negative tests, I finally saw, clear as day, what I’d been waiting for.

On Friday, October 21, my heart became Mama to two babies. And what a day that was. I am certain I experienced every emotion under the sun. From elation, to guilt, to fear, to joy, to anxiety, to uncertainty, to more joy, to more excitement and the lists continues (all of that for another post, another day).

Since I totally failed on my hopes to break the news to Evan in a special way when I found out about Evalyn, I decided to try to make up for it this time. So off we want to find the perfect way to tell Daddy. Apparently, around here, I’m a few years too early because the only Big Sister shirts I could find started at size 4T. So, we went a different route.

Evalyn got a brand new book and we stopped in at Daddy’s work to tell him our big news. Although he knew the ups and downs of the week and that I had been testing like a crazy person, I think he was still surprised to find out it was actually true.

I called him and told him to come meet me outside of his job site because I’d made something for him. He expected cookies.

What he got was a whole lot more.

Randoms for Monday

* I do not understand daylight savings time. I had to ask Evan approximately 4902882 times if it meant Eva would sleep in later, get up earlier, go to bed later, or go to bed later. “So, when she goes to bed at 7, it will feel like 6? Or 8? Or what?” Sorry but my brain haz a tiny.

* Thankfully, even though E did try to wake up hours early on Sunday morning, I was able to trick her back to sleep and we all ended up enjoying that extra hour to the fullest.

* This weekend I spent Saturday morning at a baby shower. I put Eva down for a nap before I left and when she got up, Evan told me she said “Oh dada. Mama go?” See? She does miss me when I’m gone.

* We got to enjoy a super last minute impromptu (childless) double date with our good friends on Saturday night. Let me tell you, that night out? Was needed. What a great time. And I would be lying if I said that live in baby sitters weren’t the most awesome thing on the planet.

* The weather has been beautiful lately. We’re enjoying fall to the max. Trying not to think about what’s around the corner.

* Cinnamon Pastry K-Cups? Yes please.

* My mom is here for a visit. We look forward to these days so, so, so much. Spending time with Nana is good for the soul.

Happy Monday, Friends!

Baby Signing For Dummies

Before Evalyn was born, I knew that I wanted to do baby signing with her. I had seen so many of my friends and family members teach their babies to sign and I was always amazed at how well some babies could communicate even before they spoke their first word.

We started doing basic signs with her when she was about 7 months old. I started with eat, milk, all done, and puppy. As time went on and she started to show that she was beginning to understand some of the signs, we began incorporating more. Now, our most common signs are: eat, milk, cup, more, all done, help, thank you, please, puppy, and birdie.

After these few months of signing, I thought I would share what I’ve learned. Of course, I’m not an expert. I haven’t taken any classes, read any books or really, done a whole lot of research. I’m just an everyday mom that has found it helpful to teach my kiddo signs. So, maybe what I have to say will be helpful to someone. And then again, maybe not.

First of all, don’t get frustrated when your baby doesn’t sign back right away. Some babies may start signing as early as 7-8 months and some may take quite a bit longer. Aside from puppy, which she started signing around 8 months, it took her until around her first birthday to really take off with the signs. And I was getting frustrated - wondering if she would ever learn these dang signs. She did show recognition of the signs a lot earlier than when she started to sign back to me. When I signed eat, she would smack her lips and move towards her highchair, when I signed milk she would do a funny laugh/cry until she got her milk (which she still does and I have got to catch on video), and so on. We could tell she was starting to understand the signs but wasn’t quite ready to sign to us.

And then right around her birthday, at the same time I noticed she was beginning to comprehend our language so much better, she exploded with signs. At first, she started to only sign words that she could also “say”. By say, I mean, words that she could make some kind of sound that resembled the word. Over the past two months, this was another reason we have been so glad that we taught her signs. If we hadn’t, we may have had no idea what she needed when she would walk around the house, whining and saying, “meee meee”. But, since she pairs it with the sign for milk? I know exactly what she is saying. Soon after this, she started consistently doing other signs, even if she couldn’t say the word, like please and thank you. Now, she sometimes attempts to say these words with the sign, but mostly just uses her hands. All of her other signs she also says, or tries to say, the word to go with it.

I try to consistently sign every single time I say any of these words to her so that she will learn how to use them in context. So far, thank you has never been used unprompted but please has. She is starting to pick up that if she wants me to do something for her or give her something that I will expect her to say please. She also has figured out how to use help in context. As I wrote in my post last week, she will sit in front of the fridge and push all of her fridge magnets underneath and then come to me and sign for help so I will get them out. She also signs and calls for help when she’s trying to get into her little rocking chair, or picking up something heavy or playing with a toy that needs to be turned on. Can’t tell me she doesn’t know what that one means!

My second piece of advice (if you can even call it that) is: Roll with it. Your baby may make up her own signs. She may adapt the signs that you show her to become something that is easier for her to sign. And that is great. Like I mentioned earlier, when Evalyn started recognizing the sign for eat, she would smack her lips together and move towards her high chair. So, we went with it. When I asked her if she wanted to eat, I would interchange smacking my lips together and doing the actual sign for eat. Now, she flips back and forth between these two, as well. Most often she does her made up sign but when she really wants something to eat, or when prompted, she knows how to do the proper sign.

Also, when I started signing I differentiated between cup/drink and milk. I wanted these two signs to be different so we could draw a distinction between nursing and having a cup of milk or water. So, I did the sign where you hold your hand in a C and tip it towards your mouth for cup/drink and I did the sign where you squeeze your hand together for milk. Despite my attempts to distinguish between these two, she hasn’t done so. She uses the milk sign to signal nursing and having a cup. At first she would sign it and say, “Meee” when she wanted to nurse and “cup” when she wanted her cup. Now that we’ve somewhat started the weaning process and she doesn’t nurse as often as she used to, she seems to interchange the words milk and cup pretty regularly, too. But either way, it works. She knows how to ask for a drink with her hands and with a word. That’s the bottom line to me.

Next, don’t worry if you are unsure if you’re doing the sign exactly right. I know there is controversy about this point. Some people have different opinions. I know some people think it’s important to be sure that their babies are learning proper ASL signs. For me, that wasn’t as important. If I had a family member of close friend who used ASL to communicate, I would likely be more picky about this. But at this point in her life, Evalyn doesn’t have anyone close to her who relies on sign to communicate. So, I am pretty lax. If she is able to get her point across to me with less frustration than what would happen without her signs, then I am happy.

For example, her sign for help and her sign for more are very similar but she sometimes pairs more with a “mo” sound and help with a “hep” sound so I can differentiate. When she does a sign incorrectly or makes up her own sign, I do always follow up with the correct sign, though (like I mentioned with her version of eat). I know this seems to go against what I just said about being lax about her signing so let me explain.

What I mean is that I don’t stress the issue but I try to encourage her to do the correct sign, mostly for other people’s sake. Most people who are around her on a regular basis will recognize the basic signs that she does such as more, please, thank you, eat, and all done. But, these people aren’t with her as often as I am and may not know the made up signs, or how to differentiate when two of her signs look the same – considering her words are not very clear yet. So, I keep working on them so there will be a better chance that other people can understand and communicate with her if I’m not around.

Lastly, remember that it doesn’t have to be complex. Like I said, I didn’t take any classes or read books, I just chose basic signs that I felt would be helpful for our day to day life and rolled with it. Now, you definitely have the option to be more extensive if you want. One of my good friends did a baby sign language course with her little one and absolutely loved learning new signs and enjoyed the instruction. I know lots of Mamas who have read books and use online video tutorials to learn signs and gain tips for teaching their babes. And all of that is great if you are interested in it and want to teach your baby lots of things or learn the best ways to go about signing. But, all I’m saying is that you don’t have to invest that much into it if you don’t want to. It can still be extremely effective.

To finish up, here’s Evalyn showing you a few of her signs. I’ve been trying and trying and trying to get a good video of her signing but, well … she’s not always cooperative. And now that she’s picking up more and more words, she almost always pairs her word with her sign.

Did you sign with your baby? What are your favourite signs? What did you find the most useful? What did I miss?

silent sunday: an apple a day

Reason #48282 why we love where we live: apple picking the backyard.

12 months

I got all the sentimental, sappy stuff out of the way last week, on your actual birthday, so today, I’m just going to show off some cutie pictures of you and take some time to brag about what you’ve been up to.

You are growing so big. You weigh 19 pounds 8 ounces and are 29 inches long. You wear 12 and some 18 month clothes and your hair is getting longer and longer – and the curls! Oh, the curls! You get more beautiful each and every day.

You’ve done a lot this month. Right after you turned 11 months, you took off walking and you haven’t stopped since. I’m amazed at how quickly you became steady on your feet. You motor around everywhere now – sometimes too quickly for your own good. Your favourite thing to do is to play “chase” where you run, laughing hysterically, and I “chase” you and say “I’m coming to get you”.

Over the past month, we have been spending as much time outside as possible. I know our outdoor days are limited and I want to be sure we get as much fresh air as possible before you-know-what arrives and we’re cooped up. You love to play outside where you can run free. Although, even when I take out to the big field, you always turn around and run back to the driveway. You are obsessed with the rocks. You also love to go the raspberry bushes and pick raspberries to eat for dessert almost every night. Of course, you also love going for walks around the block, seeing your puppies run and play and watching the chickens.

You loved “helping” us in the garden (ahem: green pepper picture?) and would pick (and eat) anything you saw. This month your temper showed up few times, you traveled to your Nana and Papa’s cottage, you had your birthday party and you traveled to Nana and Grandpa’s to attend Great Grandma C’s funeral and you’ve done great adjusting to being at Auntie Crystal’s house when Mommy is at work.

You have been picking up new words almost every day. It’s so fun to watch you learning to communicate. Some of your favourite words are: Mama (finally), Dada, Nana, Papa, up, cup, all done, out, go, car, more (mo), shoe, bath, baby (bay), please (pee), ball, puppy, help, hat, duck, moo, hot dog, what happened (hap?), and I love you (iiiiii).

You have also started signing a lot more over the past week (which I guess technically shouldn’t be included in this update since I’m a week late). But anyhow, you sign milk, all done, up, cup, please, thank you, help and more. Most of the words you sign you also try to say the word when signing. 

You love to sing songs, especially “Round and Round the Garden”, point and things and say “Oh”, clap your hands, blow your nose, shake your head and dance. Your moves are something else, that’s for sure. Books and babies are your favourite things to play with. You will sit and read – alone or with Mommy or Daddy for 20 or 30 minutes at a time. You are starting to learn to identify features – such as Mommy’s nose, your eyes, your ears and your toes. You are still obsessed with Mickey Mouse Clubhouse and laugh every time you hear the Hot Dog song.

You are still nursing numerous times per day and also drink cow’s milk from a sippy cup at meal time and when you are away from me. You eat three good meals a day, and while it’s sometimes frustrating, you have been doing pretty good with eating lately. I can’t complain. You still nap twice a day, usually an hour and a half both morning and afternoon and have been sleeping 10-12 hours at night. Finally. I have waited so long for this. As of last week, you now have eight little chompers in there. And it’s a good thing, because, girlfriend, you love steak.

Every day you do new, funny, and amazing things – how can I possibly remember them all to include in this update? I can’t. All I know is that this month has been the best one yet. We’ve had so much fun.

Stay sweet, little love.

Mama.

I vote YES

Teething sucks.

It’s that simple.

It sucks.

It takes your normal, happy go lucky baby and turns her into a cranky, clingy, grouchy, refuses to eat monster.

I became well seasoned to the crappiness of teething pretty quickly. Eva cut her first two teeth at 6.5 months. And they were bad, but not that bad, as I quickly found out. About a month later she decided to bust out four teeth within two weeks. And it was torture. Absolute torture. For all of us.

She was cranky. She did not sleep. And she refused to eat.

That meant I was cranky. I did not sleep. And, well, I probably ate way more than I should have.

After that bout of four teeth, she took a month off and then tooth number 7 showed up on our first night of vacation in July. And let me tell you … that tooth was from the devil. She had such a difficult time with it. It was as if her teething issues were getting worse and worse and worse with each subsequent tooth.

During these bouts of teething related discomfort, I have to admit, I gave her more doses of Tylenol than I was comfortable with. More than I ever expected I would give her. It’s just not like me to give my child medicine flippantly. But I had to. There was no other choice. It was unbearable without it. And, I’m not against medication. Not in the least. I just felt like I was giving it to her too much. There had to be another way.

After tooth #7, I remembered some of my friend’s talking about amber teething necklaces. So I started asking around. A few twitter gals told me that they had them and thought they were great. After some encouragement from Erin I went ahead and checked out Hazel Aid and ordered one. It was under $20 so I figured it was definitely worth a shot. Even if it didn’t work, it was pretty cute.

Let me point out that before those torturous days I thought the idea of a necklace that emitted some kind of resin to help relieve pain was kind of hokey. It seemed like witchcraft to me. But I was desperate. And, in desperation, Mamas will do crazy things.

A few days after ordering, the necklace arrived and Eva started wearing it 24/7, except while in the bath. Since she started wearing it, I’ve had to answer a lot of questions. Mostly: Why is your baby wearing a necklace? and Does it work?

I could always answer the first one but I had trouble answering the second one. I had no idea if it worked because she took a long break from teething and didn’t seem to be working on any new teeth over the next few months. I figured when it was time to teeth again, I’d start seeing the signs and at that point, I’d use my judgement to see if I felt like the necklace was easing her pain at all – compared to the struggles she had with teething before the necklace.

Well, folks, I vote yes. The necklace does help. It is working.

How do I know?

I was feeling around in Eva’s mouth last week, a few days before her first birthday, just to see if there was any sign of anything happening, and know what I found?

Tooth #8. There it was. All sharp and pointy. And I had no clue it was coming. My baby had slept 12 hours the night before. Why hadn’t she been up every half hour for the past three nights if she was teething? I can only assume it’s because she wasn’t uncomfortable. And I can only assume that her lack of discomfort was because of the necklace.

So, I’ll say it again. I vote yes. Best darn twenty bucks I’ve ever spent.

I’m not here. I’m there. Or something.

Thanks again for all of the prayers being offered on behalf of our family. We greatly appreciate them and they are truly being felt. Thank you also for all of the happy birthday wishes for my little lady yesterday.

I won’t be around here today but you can head over to Loves of Life where one of my very besties, Katie, writes and listen to me spout off about all the things I wish I knew about becoming a parent. Now that I have an entire year under my belt, I figured I might have some wisdom to share. Or not.

Katie is witty, and funny, and real – and definitely one of the best writers I know. I’m honoured that she’s given me the chance to invade her space while she’s off enjoying fun in the sun with her husband – sans baby. Hello, jealous!

So, go on. What are you waiting for? Head on over.

One

My Evalyn,

Today you are one. How quickly you have changed, right before my eyes.

From the most beautiful newborn that I have ever seen

to my sweet, spunky little girl.

I cannot think of you without having my heart swell with pride, love and joy. I will get to all of your stats and fun things you’re doing another day. Today, I just want to dwell on you.

You have captured my heart in ways I could never imagine. From your first breath, I loved you more than I ever thought possible. I will never forget those very first moments, when your Daddy placed you in my arms and my eyes met my first born daughter for the first time. I remember praising Jesus for bringing you to me safely. I remember speaking to you, calling you by name for the first time, and smothering you with kisses. I remember looking at your Daddy and seeing the exact same expression of love that I felt in my heart. In that moment, I knew that we had been blessed with the greatest gift we could have ever asked for.

On that day, you made us a family. Just when I thought I couldn’t love your Daddy anymore, I witnessed him become your father. You have created a bond and a connection between us that is deeper than anything we’ve ever known. You are the very best thing we’ve ever done together.

Over the past year as I have watched you grow, I have become a different person myself. I have become fully and completely your mother. All things are different to me now. All things are for you.

Your laughter is what I look forward to each morning. I anticipate seeing you learn and grow and change every day. You are just so much fun to me. I cherish you.

Because of you, I now know a different kind of love. A love so whole and so real and so complete that it can never be replaced or taken away. I will love you unconditionally for the rest of my life.

Happy Birthday to you, my baby.

Love, Mumma

You’re Invited!

My house is a disaster. My baby has an awfully runny nose (but bless her heart, is still as happy as can be) and I have to work later today, but I’m taking a quick second to pop in to share with you the invitations from Evalyn’s big birthday party – which was absolutely perfect, I might add! I’ll be back tomorrow with more details, photos and a recap of the day.

A few months ago, one of my very favourite bloggy Mommas, Liz, decided to open an etsy shop featuring her customized birth announcements. When I checked them out, I wished she had been around when Evalyn was born to do her announcement.

But, once it got to be time to start thinking about birthday party stuff, I knew that it would be a great idea to discuss my ideas with Liz. And I was right. She worked so hard and so diligently to create something that fit exactly what I had in my mind – even though exactly what I had in my mind changed four hundred and seventy two times over the course of three days.

And then, when circumstances required a last minute date change for the party, she got a new one made up and ordered ASAP so that I would be sure to have it in time to send out and give our guests enough notice about the party.

Liz helped bring the theme of the party to life with this gorgeous invitation.

If you are looking for customized birth announcements or birthday party invitations, be sure to check out Super Cute Cards – you won’t be disappointed.

Silent Sunday: It’s HERE!

The decorations are made. The menu is planned. The guests are on their way.The day is finally here.

This afternoon, we’ll be kicking it autumn style with our family and friends as we celebrate the big FIRST BIRTHDAY of our Evalyn.

Stay tuned next week for a whole line up of birthday posts. I’m going to tell you about the theme, the dress, the inspiration, the invitations, the food, the decorations, the guests, the planning, the games, and on and on and on. I’m going to over do it. I’m going to annoy you. I’m going cherish the last week that my first child is a baby. I’m going to celebrate her life to the max. What can I say? My firstborn will only turn one once. Can you really blame me?