My Harvest

Today, I spent my evening making and canning tomato sauce with a portion of the tomatoes from my garden. (Or should I say ... Evan's garden ... see this post). I say a portion of the tomatoes because I still have a gazillion more waiting to be diced and canned. Thanks to my dear friend, T, for motivating me and giving me a few tips on how to make the sauce.

I started out by washing the tomatoes in sink.


Then I started chopping. I chopped and I chopped and I chopped. I loaded them up in my big stock pot and began to stir and boil.


As the tomatoes were cooking I drained the juice off and kept it for later. When they were done boiling, Evan came in and helped me puree them.

Then we transferred the sauce into the jars. We added some extra spice to the leftover juices and returned it to the pot to boil some more. We then used this to fill the leftover jars. I will be able to use this yummy base to add to soups and casseroles throughout the year.


Now, a couple hours later, as I sit here on the couch, relaxing and watching a movie, I am pleased every few minutes when I hear another pop and I know that the jars are sealing! Looks like my first attempt at canning was successful. Hopefully it tastes as good as it smells.

It's Official....

I am ready for Evan to get home. I have had a busy, eventful week but it is coming to an end and I am ready to return to some sort of normalcy in my life. While he's been away, I've been able to get a lot of school work done and I've also taken the time to visit with and catch up with a number of friends that I haven't spent much time with lately. I probably wouldn't have taken the opportunity to get together with all of these people had he been home, so I was grateful for that chance. But, I am ready to start cooking dinner again. I am ready to talk about my day with him as it comes to a close. I am ready for life to be normal.

Everything

My brother showed me this video a couple of years ago and earlier today, I was reminded of it when I heard the song the radio. I get goose bumps every time I hear the song or watch this clip. I'm sure many of you have already seen it. If you haven't, I urge you to take a few minutes to watch it. If you have seen it, take a minute to watch it again. I'm not going to try to write anything about it, I will just let the video speak for itself.

Did you know ...

...that mountain lions are known by more than 100 names?

• Cougar
• Puma
• Moutain Lion
• Panther
• Catamount
• Painter
• Felis concolour (scientific name)
  
• Cat of one Colour (translation of scientific name)

I guess you learn something new everyday.

Computer Advice

I am contemplating purchasing a new computer in the new year. The laptop I am using currently is less than two years old (I bought it January '07) but it is just not that great. Regrettably, it was an ill-advised, hasty purchase. My old laptop - the sweet Toshiba that was faithful to my brother and I for so long - breathed her last breaths just days before my second term of third year began. I was in a pickle and needed to get a new laptop ASAP, so I basically purchased the first "good deal" that I saw. Now, less than two years later, I am regretting that decision.

So, here I am asking for your advice, opinions, thoughts and suggestions. Should I go ahead and buy a new computer? Should I hold out until this one is no longer functional? Laptop? Desktop? Mac? PC? Leave a comment to let me know what has/has not worked for you, and whether or not you have any advice when shopping for computers.

Thanks!

Some Answers...

I have answers to some of the questions I received repeatedly after writing this post.

1. No, I didn't buy the bowls.

2. No, we didn't buy the armor.

3. And, no, I don't have a clue as to why Home Sense is selling armor anyway.

Falling For Fall

It is starting to feel like fall. And I am not just talking about the weather. In fact, the weather hasn't really started to feel much like fall, aside from a few cooler days that we've had. Instead, I am talking about many other things that have been occurring that are a sure sign that fall is nearing. Fall is my favourite season and so there are many enjoyable things that I associate with that season. This weekend and today, much of my time was spent doing "autumn" things. I have made a list of some things that remind me of fall and things that indicate to me that fall has arrived/is arriving. Many of these things can be and are done at all times of the year, but for some reason I have strongly associated them with autumn. Don't ask me why. Anyway, here's my list...
~ Apple Crisp (I can smell it baking now)
~ Leaves changing
~ Homemade soup
~ A fire in the fireplace
~ Sitting on the couch, curled up in a blanket, reading a book (not sure why I associate this with fall when I do it nearly every day, all year?)
~ Autumn leaves
~ Decorating my house with scarecrows and pumpkins
~ Chilly weather
~ Squash
~ Back to school
~ Having no lights on except candles in the evening (Also not sure what this has anything to do with autumn, but we seem to live on candle light quite often in the fall)
~ Harvest meals

And the number one way to tell that autumn is coming....

~ HUNTING SEASON HAS BEGUN!!!!!! Yes, that's right, goose season opened a few weeks ago and later this week Evan will head North for an eleven day moose hunt. I always know that autumn is here when Evan is not! :D

Can't Take Him Anywhere...

This evening Evan's baseball game was canceled due to bad weather so we decided to have ourselves a little date night. He's leaving next week for eleven days so it was nice to spend some time together. I had some money left from my birthday which was a few weeks ago so he suggested we go shopping and grab some Thai food for dinner. Sounded great to me.

So, we headed out to the mall and did some shopping for a few hours. I found a few great deals on some nice clothes for the fall. After we were done, we enjoyed our dinner and were ready to leave. At the last minute, however, I decided to stop in at Home Sense before we left. Home Sense is one of our favourite stores. Yes, I said OUR favourite, not MY favourite. Believe it or not, my hubby is a fairly fashion-forward guy and he has great taste (although he might not always demonstrate that in his choice of wardrobe). Just tonight we discussed that even though he likes fashion, his line of work and hobbies don't always allow for him to express that. Not only is he fashion-forward and trendy but he also has a knack for decorating. Usually when I buy and arrange a new decorative piece for our home the next time I turn around he has it in a different spot or rearranged in some way. If he's in a nice mood and being senstive to my feelings, he might look at the new piece and say "Are you sure you like it that way?" before proceeding to rearrange it. And, he's almost always right ... his way usually looks better.

Anyway, I'm getting off topic. Tonight he wasn't very interested in the stuff Home Sense had to offer. He said he was disappointed and that although he could normally spend hours wandering the aisles of this store they didn't seem to have anything that caught his fancy. Too bad for him, I was still looking around so he would just have to be patient for a little longer.

So, at this point we parted ways. I strolled over to the kitchen section and he went else where. I was standing at the end of an aisle internally contemplating the usefulness of some really really really cute mixing bowls when I heard him say, "What do you think of this, Luc?" I turned around and what did I see?

To my horror and astonishment, I turned to stand face to face with my husband who, standing in the middle of the store, was dressed in armor! He was proudly bearing a helmet and chest piece while calling out what sounded to me like battle cries. Despite my mortification, I couldn't help but laugh (along with 5 or 6 older ladies around us). I told him to go take that stuff off and stop acting like a child. So, off he goes. About 30 seconds later, I was back in my zone pondering the usefulness of the bowls and suddenly a loud "AWOOOOGA" followed by uproarious laughter interupted my thoughts. What had he done now?

I timidly peeked around the corner of the aisle and saw him there, beaming like a child, with an old fashioned horn in his hand. It was then that I decided our shopping adventure was over, it was time to go home. I can't take him anywhere!!

A Realization

Today I came to the realization that only crazy people think it's a good idea to go to grad school. Apparently, I am one of the crazed. What in the world was I thinking?

Off to read another 5,000 pages ...

Mixed Emotions

There are three things about human emotions that particularly amaze me. First, emotions have such a broad range of intensity. Sometimes our emotions are dull and almost invisible while at other times they are so intense that we cannot ignore them. Human emotions exist on such a huge spectrum of complexity. Some emotions are quite simple to understand and place (example, happiness) while others are more complex and difficult to comprehend (example, pride). Secondly, I find it fascinating that our emotions can alter so quickly. We might be feeling elated in one moment and a quick turn of events can turn that elation into incredible sadness within a matter of seconds. Lastly, our emotions can be compounded and multiplied as we often experience more than one at the same time, some which may be contradictory. Very rarely can we describe the way we are feeling through one label. We often have a combination of emotions occurring simultaneously with different intensities and complexities. Hence the term, mixed emotions.

Tonight, I am experiencing this phenomenon of mixed emotions. Tonight, some of my emotions are dull and others are quite intense. Some are simple to understand and others, quite complex. The emotions I am feeling have changed quickly a number of times today. And here, in this moment, I find myself feeling a number of different emotions all at once.

Earlier this evening, I said goodbye to my best friend. She and her sister will be boarding a plane in a matter of hours and heading to Scotland, where they will be living for a couple of years. This is not new news to me, I have known that this was their plan for a long time. However, knowing that it was coming did not make saying goodbye any easier.

There are so many emotions flowing through me. All day, I was feeling trepidation, knowing that it would not be long until I would be seeing them for the last time for a while. I am sad to say goodbye. I spend a lot (and I mean a LOT) of time with these gals and I know that they will leave a big hole in my life and I will miss them dearly. Yet, at the same time, I feel excitement for them as they begin this journey. I know the stories and adventures they come across in Scotland will be once in a lifetime experiences and I can't wait to hear about it. I feel proud of them for following their dreams. I feel scared when I think about what I will do on the days when I want nothing more than to laugh with them. I feel nervous for them as they encounter new challenges and come across stumbling blocks on their way. I feel eager to make plans to head to the UK to visit them. I even feel a twinge of jealousy because they are going on this awesome adventure without me! Above and beyond these emotions, there are so many more that I cannot quite place and that I do not really understand.

Girls, I wish you all the best on this journey. I miss you and love you dearly. I am sad that you are gone but happy that you have found the courage to follow your dreams. I will be praying for you and thinking of you often.

The tears are flowing freely in this house tonight.

The Weekend to End Breast Cancer

This past week, September 5-7, I participate in the Weekend to End Breast Cancer benefiting the Princess Margaret Hospital for the second year in a row. My team, the Marching Mammys, was made up of some extraordinary women. I walked with my mother and mother-in-law, both celebrating 5 years cancer free, Amy and Becki (my sister-in-laws), and BonnieLee (a dear friend of our family who has experienced the effects of breast cancer in her family).

Our weekend began Friday night when we met up at a Days Inn in Toronto. We then headed over to the Direct Energy Centre to sign in, get our tent assignments and do all the admin work. We even got cool airbrush tattoos and some of us bought some WEBC paraphenalia.

After registration was complete, we headed to an Irish Pub to have some din din. We then headed back to the hotel where we painted our shirts to wear on Sunday and head to bed.

Saturday morning ... up at 5 a.m. and in a cab by 5:30. The morning started out rainy but after about 2 1/2 hours of walking, it began to clear up. The rain was very light so the drizzle didn't bother us much.

Part way through the day, Suzy Q had a lovely surprise when three of her dear friends and co-workers were waiting at a cheering station with signs and posters and lots of noise to cheer her on! What a great encouragement to have such support.


We finished Day One (~35 km) around 4:30 p.m. We then headed to our tents to get our beds set up. We all enjoyed a lovely hot shower and then headed to dinner. Yummy food!!


After dinner, a few of us did some yoga and then headed to the dance. It seems crazy to dance after walking 35 km straight but honestly, it's the best thing for you. It really helps you to loosen up and move different muscles.


After the dance, at around 9 pm, we all headed to bed. I slept like a log even though I was sleeping on the ground. I think when your body is that tired you have no choice but to sleep well.

Sunday morning, we were up at 6 a.m., packed up our stuff and headed off to breakfast and were on our way by 7:15. We were all feeling pretty good for most of Sunday morning but once the rain started and showed no signs of stopping, we could feel the energy dwindling. However, there was lots of encouragement along the way. Nothing like handsome Toronto firemen to keep us walking!



By about 2 p.m. on Sunday, some of us were having a hard time, but with the encouragement of our other teammates, fellow walkers, and crew, we were able to push through and keep moving. Here is a picture of us at the last rest stop with just under 3 km to go.


We stopped for a coffee during the last leg of the walk and we were able to cross the finish line just before 4 p.m.


We were met by our loved ones who were beaming with pride to see us hand in hand across the line. We then proceeded to the closing ceremonies where we were shocked to see a 96 year old woman DANCE across the finish line. Wow!!! She certainly put things in perspective for me as a 22 year old who, at times, wondered how I would finish the walk alive.

We then cheered as the crew and volunteers from the weekend joined us in the closing ceremonies and finally, and most importantly, as the survivors of the Weekend to End Breast Cancer entered the ceremony.

This event is so close to my heart, especially this year, when I walked with my two mother's, who are both 5 years cancer free. At times, when my feet were soaked and covered in blisters and my legs would hardly move, I had to remind myself that the pain I was feeling was pale in comparison to the pain felt by those who are undergoing treatment and those who have lost a loved one to the terrible disease. I can handle the sore muscles, blisters and exhaustion if it means that, in some way, I have made a difference.

Back to School - 18 Years Running

Every September for the past 18 years has marked back to school time for me. I really love back to school time! I love everything about it. I love getting my books ready, picking out my back to school outfit, organizing my school bag, picking my classes, buying my textbooks, organizing my schedule of readings, everything! (I know, I'm a weirdo). And no matter how old I get and how many times I go back to school, it is just as exciting every time. I'm starting to wonder what I will do the first time September rolls around and I am not going back to school. Maybe I will just be a student forever ... I'm sure Evan would love that. I'm sure I'll have to be reminded that I talked about how much I love going back to school in a few months when everything is crazy and I don't have time to brush my teeth. But for now, I'm going to fill out my 4-month white board calendar.

Worry Wart

Tomorrow I will be starting the first day of my grad program and I am nervous! I mean, butterfly in my tummy, not sure I'll sleep tonight nervous. I can't seem to find the reason for this. I am returning to the same school I received my undergraduate degree from and I will be continuing in the same department as well. I know the ins and outs of the University and the department. Yet, I am still nervous.

I often struggle with anxiety like this. I think I seek out things to worry about or something. Not good, I know. Sometimes I feel a sense of nervousness and anxiety in my stomach and I have to stop and ask myself, "Okay, what could possibly be bothering me?" Usually I determine that it is nothing, or something relatively close to nothing.

Worry plagues me. I might even say that it is one of my worst struggles. I worry about money, school, work, my husband, my family, my marriage, my housework, my dog, the corns on my feet, my plans, other people's plans, my kids (that I don't even have yet), other people's kids, my dinner plans, the unfolded laundry, the phone conversation I am going to have later, the car payment, the broken hamper and on and on it goes. Okay, so some of those things might be an exaggeration - I don't actually worry about the corns on my feet but you get the point. I worry TOO MUCH! I worry about things that I need not worry about ... things I do not have control over (as much as I like to think that I should have control over them).

Sometimes I find it difficult to draw the line between having a healthy concern over the well-being of myself and those I love and worrying constantly about everything in my life. For example, I often worry excessively about our financial situation (although I have progressively gotten better at this over the course of our marriage). On the one hand, I convince myself that if I didn't have any sense to keep track of our finances and manage our money responsibly then we could potentially be in a bad way. On the other hand, I have witnessed God provide for us time and time again in situations where I had been worrying about how we were going to afford something or manage to get by on what we had available to us. You see the problem? I worry about how I am going to handle my life. I don't trust that God will guide me, provide for me, and keep constant care over me despite the fact that every single time I am in a situation "worth worrying about" He blesses me abundantly. I think it is possible to be organized, responsible and on top of things without being a worry wart. I am praying that I will be able to find this balance and trust God in all circumstances, letting go of the worry that weighs me down. I am trying to think of it this way - the more worry and anxiety I let in to my heart and mind, the less space there is for God in there.

Okay, so when I began this post it was entitled "Grad School" and now it has turned in to something very different. Instead of simply letting you all know that I'm starting a new program tomorrow I have reflected upon the sin in my life and reminded myself of the goodness of my Lord in all circumstances.

And, guess what? I don't feel anxious about school anymore. I will have to remember to look back on this post next time I am fretting over earthly matters.