Wednesday, February 6, 2013

Today

Today I am overwhelmed. I am stressed. I am frazzled. I am looking around me and seeing 4893048309 things that need to be done, yet not being able to pin point the ONE thing I need to start with.

This morning, I woke up and nursed baby, changed diaper, sat on the couch to help Eva eat her breakfast (which my husband so graciously makes every single day), stopped baby from bonking her head on the table, got kids dressed, and heated up my coffee twice before ever taking a sip. I took Eva to preschool, drove 30 minutes to the closest shopping center, nursed the baby in the car, bundled her up in 45 layers to carry her into the store since I know groceries can’t fit in the cart around her seat, got groceries and necessities at Walmart, boogied home, unloaded groceries, changed world’s biggest blowout, packed baby back into car, drove to pick up toddler from preschool, came home, threw together something that hardly resembled a lunch, asked toddler to sit on her bum 87 times, fed half of toddler’s lunch to the dog, put two kids down for naps, cleaned up lunch, scrubbed highchair down for the 852nd time this week.

And then, I ate a chocolate cupcake and drank a Pepsi. Because making it through that rather normal morning seemed to get the best of me.

Sometimes life is so overwhelming that I just don’t even know where to start. I need to clean the bathroom. I need to dust. I need to update photo frames. I need to organize piles of stuff in the basement. I need to clear off our dressers. I need to finish (or, start?) Eva’s big girl room. I need to go through the kid’s closets. I need to mop. I need to vacuum. I need to clean the fridge. I need to meal plan. I need to. I need to. I need to.

But why?

I will do all of this and my husband will pee on the toilet seat, the toddler will crush her goldfish crackers into the rug, the baby will spit up on the hardwood floor and then use her own stomach to mop it up. \

And then I’ll do it again.

Today, life feels monotonous and insurmountable.

Maybe tomorrow I’ll feel like superwoman standing on a mountaintop tackling life head on.

But today I just don’t.

10 comments:

Cindy said...

I COULD HAVE WRITTEN THIS POST. I feel the same way. Lately things are just so monotonous you begin to wonder why you do them - after all, the kids are going to dump all their toys out in 2 seconds and no one will ever notice the house was dusted. Do laundry? So it can sit unfolded in a wrinkly mess for 2 days (or more)? I totally understand how you feel. Hang in there!

Taylor said...

Mama, you are not alone. I was just venting about this very thing to a co-worker earlier. It's just so frustrating sometimes. :( I hope things turn around for you today!

Moe said...

I feel so overwhelmed some days and I don't even have children to keep up with. You are awesome! And whether you feel like it or not I think E and the girlies see you as superwoman. So don't forget that part. :)

Gina said...

I'm so glad that someone else wrote a post about feeling overwhelmed since that's all I have been posting about for weeks...er, months. But I'm not glad that you feel this way. Would it make you feel better to know that Lo dropped four of my headbands into the toilet this morning after he peed in it? Love you, friend.

Allyce said...

Girl, you are not alone! I only have one and I feel like this probably more often than I should. Ah well, there's always tomorrow! ;)

Jessica Gehman said...

I feel the same way some days girl. Although I don't have any kids, I live with a 29 year old and 26 year old man, who combined I swear make as big a mess and are as useless as two kids.

Some days, it's okay to use naptime (or in my case, video game time) to drink a glass of wine and not clean a damn thing. You got this!

Laura said...

I've had many many days like this where I just don't even know where or how to start! And then I have days that I'm just zooming around the house like a mania cleaning and organizing etc. It will pass!

Kyle said...

'Like' ... these are the days you just have to give yourself a bit of a break and enjoy the kiddos.

Ashley @ Gratitude and Latitude said...

I've been feeling way overwhelmed lately, too. But you are superwoman and I heart you. I'm only a text away if you need to vent :)

Liz said...

Oh do I hear you, girlfriend. And really, I know we all do. I feel this way on an almost daily basis and its a struggle to feel like any of it is worth my time. Anything but just playing with the kiddos. And I agree with Moe - I'm sure they think you are superwoman. :) Because you are, of course.