Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Mama Feelings

I am finding it very hard to believe that this week marks two months since Evalyn entered our lives. Can somebody please explain to me where the time went? Because I sure as heck have no idea.

Yesterday I got to thinking about some of the things that I didn’t expect as I entered motherhood. One of those things – something that no one could have ever prepared me for – is the number of different emotions that I would feel (not to mention the intensity of those emotions).

Some of the things I have felt over the past two months are:

~ joyful ~ elated ~ helpless ~ like a rock star ~ confident ~ insecure ~ exhausted ~ energetic ~ in love ~ nervous ~ worried ~ puzzled ~ complete ~

I have felt some of these things at different times, and some at the same time. How it’s possible to feel like a rockstar and to feel insecure at the same time, I’ll never know – but it’s somehow possible.

I have had days where I feel 100% confident in the decisions I’m making with Evalyn and other days where I’ve felt like I’m doing it all wrong.

I have had days where I feel like I can tackle a billion jobs and conquer the world and other days where I feel like I can’t even manage to change my underoos.

I have had days where I feel like this baby mama thing ain’t so bad at all and other days where I feel like I will never survive the next few months.

But, through them all, I know one thing …

This girl lights up my life

007.

and I wouldn’t have it any other way.

13 comments:

Jacqueline and Andy said...

Motherhood is intense, isn't it!?

Your post reminds me of one that I wrote when Roscoe was about 4 months old called "mom storm":

http://marblesrolling.blogspot.com/2009/09/mom-storm.html

Taryn said...

You are such an awesome mama and woman. I love hearing your insights into motherhood.

Jess said...

We ALL have days where we feel like we're doing it all wrong.

It's the crux of motherhood. And I say motherhood because I guarantee our husbands aren't sitting in bed at night, wondering if that ONE THING they did is going to somehow irrevocably mess up our baby for life.

Men have it SO easy.

Brittany Ann said...

Ahhh! She's so precious!

I know what you mean. Even just marriage has made me feel like that. Some days, I can do it all. Others, I worry I can't boil water.

Being a woman is a tough job!

Holly said...

Jess's comment made me laugh...it is so true!
I'm sorry to tell you that occasionally wondering if you're "doing it wrong" never goes away.
But it's awesome, isn't it?
Love the new blog look!

Jackie said...

Being a mommy is a blast, isn't it? And even when they are long gone from the nest, those feelings never go away--at least from what I understand anyway. ;)

Kayla said...

Awww! I can't wait to have these these "feelings"! I mean I have some already, but it will be so different when I can see him. by the way, I'm loving the new blog! (I usually read from google reader!)

Callie Nicole said...

Beautifully put! I just found your blog, and I've been enjoying reading it. I'm a Christian wife as well, and we're expecting our first baby in March - I can't wait to see for myself what motherhood is like!

Ashley said...

I am glad that you are enjoying your new role! I also thought I would let you know that I have a CSN giveaway going on right now ;)

Shaina said...

You are the best mommy! I just know it. <3

Karlala said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Karlala said...

I Love reading your Blogs. I can really relate to this one-- We will forever cherish our 'Mama Feelings' no matter what!

Abbie said...

Oh the emotions! They drive me crazy with how quickly they can change and home intense they can be. So glad you are finding balance and loving every minute of it!